Is this flirting? I'm so out of touch

[OhLawdStylo]

Until recently, I was in a very long-term relationship which meant I lost the art of flirting and/or detecting flirting, both of which I used to be absolutely world-class at.

I go to a fitness class. It's a small class - 5 women plus instructor - so we know each other quite well. The instructor is always very complimentary to me. But that's because I work really hard, I've made really good progress and there's a running joke that my life's a mess (its not really) so kind words are welcome!

A few weeks ago at the pub, one of the women made an off-hand comment about my stonewalling the instructor's flirting. It was part of a different conversation so I didn't ask what she meant. I'd never thought the instructor was flirting before. It hadn't even occurred to me.

Last week, I spotted in the mirror the same woman and another woman exchange a kind of 'knowing' look between them as the instructor helped me with weights. I didn't think too much of it.

Last night, we were all joking about body goals. I said something like "I'm quite happy. If I could just get my abs to pop. And tone my arms. And lose my fat arse. And get rid of my squishy hips. So not happy at all then, LOL". The instructor replied "No, you're perfect". Until that point, we'd all been joking. His tone wasn't very jokey. It went quiet and was a bit awkward.

I'm now wondering if the instructor has actually been flirting with me for a while and I just haven't noticed because I'm so out of practice. Would you interpret this as flirting? I guess you can't know without being there, sorry.

I'm a bit scrambled. I was in an LTR for ages and only recently started to get my head around being single and all that entails.

*who have been victims

@Pinkbonbon I get where you're coming from, I really do. But I really don't think my comments have landed in that way.

My life being a mess is about a series of disasters that befell me for a few months one after the other. There was absolutely nothing linked to low self-esteem or similar. My commentary on these disasters was always good humoured and a kind of "Guess what's gone bloody wrong this week".

The comments about my body were said in a really lighthearted conversation. I said I wanted me abs to pop through. But then I felt a bit boastful so jokingly listed other things that could change. I really think this would've been interpreted as a joke, as intended, because I don't have the things I was listing as needing to change (fat arse etc.).

But I do absolutely take your point. I think I worded my OP wrongly. I'm a really flippant person. I should've explained what I meant better in the OP.

Okay, Okay, you have just painted him sound creepy.

Yes I am a man, I would like to know what would be your idea of flirting and creepy. Let us know how and what to say or approach woman without being creepy.

I would like to see a woman approach and flirt with me but I've never seen women approaching men. DO give us some credit we are us a man nowadays very scared approaching woman for this reason.

Us men we are stuck between rock and hard places, Damned not Talking/flirting with woman, Damned/Painted Creepy if we try to Talk/Flirt.

(NO, NO, I do not want to talk about weather either, if women consider that as an ice breaker but not for me).

If it's flirting it's pretty mild stuff. From what your classmates say it's plausible that he might be into you, and has let it show a couple of times, but is largely keeping it professional (hence nothing really forward). Which is the opposite of creepy really.