Feel deflated

[OneHitWonder40]

I have been with my bf for nearly 2yrs. We live together and are getting married next year.

I love him so much but sometimes I feel drained with him and like I’m banging my head against a brick wall as I am worried about his health and welfare.

he is a big guy (21st. Was a lot lighter when we met) but the problem is, he is always poorly with a cold or tired and we just don’t seem to have much of a life anymore because of this. I keep telling him to go to the doctors or take vitamin’s at least, but he just says no before falling asleep on the sofa. I feel like I’m getting nothing out of this relationship anymore. But I love him dearly and should be with him through sickness and health and all that. But I just feel drained 😏

If you stay then you will be constantly having to nag or cajole him into taking care of himself, do you really want that role?
It's not your job to fix him, it's down to him and it sounds like he just can't be arsed.

Its up to you how long you are prepared for him to impact on your life though.

Personally I've just ended a 3yr relationship with someone and one of the major issues was him being clinically obese, diagnosed as diabetic and STILL choosing to eat so much utter crap, a heart attack waiting to happen.

It's heartbreaking to watch and all my efforts to cook healthy meals and offer heart healthy alternatives were ignored. Sometimes for your own sanity you need to walk away.
Good luck op.💐

I wouldn't make any plans to marry until you feel 100% about the relationship.

You probably feel drained because you want to make things better for him and as caring as that is unfortunately you can't help someone who won't be helped.

I had an ex who was very obese and ate huge portions of fattening food as he was addicted to it. I tried to encourage him to eat healthy food but he wasn't interested. I realised this wasn't the life I wanted for myself and ended it.

Being in a relationship with someone who is sick brings many challenges but I think it's much harder when the person makes no attempt to help themselves.

You need to decide what's right for you.

For whatever reason, do not marry into a relationship that you're not getting anything out of.

'But I love him so much' is the fairy story. You're not in a fairy story though. You're in a relationship with someone you give everything to, who gives you nothing back. Why do you think it would be a good idea to marry him? Breaking up seems a more sensible option, if you want to be happy in the long run.

and should be with him through sickness and health

You're not married. There are no 'shoulds'.