All my relationships hurt at the moment

[Atethehalloweenchocs]

I moved to a small town some years ago to be near elderly parent. My parent is now dead and my step parent relies on me for care. Our relationships is not easy, they regularly take out their stress on me, and makes very little effort for me (ie, its my birthday next week and we have always as a family gone out for lunch or dinner as well as buying a present. I asked what he wanted to do and his reply was 'I have already bought you a present'). I have a male friend from work who has been my friend for years. He has started pressuring for more from our relationship and although I have told him I am not going to have an affair with him, keeps trying. And I had a really good friend I made through a local club who I was really close to for a while. We have a mutual acquaintance who does not like me and it all came to a head when there was an argument which I was not involved in, but which was about how the acquaintance treated me when my mum died (the other people in the group called her out on it and she flounced off and left the group, I did not know about this until weeks later). Since then my friend only contacts me when we are going to be at something at the same time. She acts friendly, makes noises about how busy she is and sorry she has not been in touch, but if I suggest going for coffee shys away from it. I just cant believe my life right now, I feel like I cant get anything right with relationships. I used to have a big group of friends, a busy fun life. Now I feel lonely and unlovable. Not sure what I want here, just have to say this somewhere.

Sorry OP, that sounds rubbish for you.

Can you try and plan a trip away to see some old friends?

Thanks for replying. I have a trip planned in October, but perhaps need to put something in earlier. It does just feel really rubbish tbh. But taking a break is a good idea.

Any activity groups or classes you could join to make some new friends? Small towns can be very cliquey.

Do you want to continue to care for your step-parent? I would consider whether you're doing this out of a false sense of obligation, and if so, whether you can reduce or stop.

Is there a way of reconnecting with your old circle of friends, are they still where you moved away from? Would moving back be an option?

As for the pushy male friend, you need to cut him out, really. He's no friend.

@Ofcourseshecan , yes, I do join things. It is quite cliquey in this town and I have not met a lot of people I connect with.

@category12 , yes, big step back from the 'friend'. I would not be surprised if he done this before. I am in touch with my old friends, but moving back (overseas) is not going to be possible. As for the step parent, I dont feel stopping completely is reasonable, I just dont think I could live with the idea he is completely alone. But yes, a lot is my sense of obligation - maybe a few days a week with no contact and limited contact at other times. He can improve when I do take a break from him. Just really sad that it takes that.