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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I really can't believe this - am bewildered and shocked at DH

122 replies

strangesituation · 12/02/2008 14:23

Ok, before I start I am a MN regular and have been since my first DC was born in 2001. I remember the supermarket grapes, the river of sweetcorn, all the thread on breast V bottle and many others, but I have had to change my name for this. You will realise why in a minute.

When I first met my DH he was trying to forge a living out of being an artist. He is fantastic but he soon realised how competitive it is and soon realised he just had to make a hobby out of it rather than a career. He now has a more mainstream job which often requires him to work from home so he has the smallest bedroom as his home office.

The DC's wanted to do some drawing today and I went in his home office to get some printer paper for them to use. While I was in there I opened the wrong drawer and found some of his recent "artwork" and was absolutely shocked at what I found. He had done some pencil sketches of women - normal stuff such as women walking in the rain with umbrellas, women having picnics in the park etc. However he had stuck what looks like ladygarden hair on some of the picture, so part of the umbrella was made out of this as was the womans shoes in the picnic picture. Its definitely not his own as - god I am cringing as I write this - his is red so I strongly suspect he has been rummaging in the bin in the bedroom to get my clippings out. I went to check the bin as I had trimmed my ladygarden on Monday and the trimmings were no longer there. Worse still some of the "decorative pieces" were blonde and I have NEVER had a blonde ladygarden so where on earth is he getting those bits from. I am mortified and disgusted with him. What on earth am I going to say to him?

OP posts:
strangesituation · 12/02/2008 16:42

Thank you Timeforme x

OP posts:
Baffy · 12/02/2008 16:56

I really hope you're ok. It could be something and nothing.

FWIW I'd have a think about how you will react if you do hear something you don't particularly like the sound of.

Good luck.

TheDevilWearsPrimark · 12/02/2008 17:07

Oh no, if this is genuine a lot of us will feel really bad.

Desiderata · 12/02/2008 17:18

I don't think ss is trolling at all. It's all far too weird for that!

Bless you. I really don't know what to say ... it's so darned weird we just can't help smirking.

Rhubarb · 12/02/2008 17:23

This still going?
Well ss if you are a regular you'll know the kind of trolling threads that appear on MN and you must realise that yours is a big contender so you shouldn't be so shocked. Put yourself in our shoes - wouldn't you be sat there at the pc screen protecting cynicism?

But if you are genuine, then the answer is simple. You wait until he comes home, tell him that you opened the drawer looking for something and came across the pictures, then ask him where the hairs came from. Watch his face closely as you ask him - if his eyes flick to the sides then he's thinking of a lie to tell you.

What I find so unbelievable about this thread is the way you go on about this one blonde haired friend whose pubes it could possibly be and how to approach her to ask her. Not the most rational of thoughts there.

Rhubarb · 12/02/2008 17:24

And why would you assume that the pubes were female anyway? Does he not have any blonde male friends? With moustaches or beards perhaps?

KerryMum · 12/02/2008 17:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Teuch · 12/02/2008 19:16

or...

you could stick come pubes to a drawing you did yourself (perhaps an 'all-seeing' eye?) and plant it in his drawer?

Then see what he does...

Blu · 12/02/2008 21:52

Am I alone in not finding it particularly weird?

Anyway, maybe it's nose hair?

KerryMum · 12/02/2008 22:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Blu · 12/02/2008 22:55

Exactly, KerryMum.

Novel, as part of an umberella, though.

PMSL

KerryMum · 12/02/2008 22:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Blu · 12/02/2008 22:58

Oh, god, one of my former neighbours was collecting all his nose pickings and other bodily detrtus and baking it, for some sort of art event. And there was the artist who puts himself in a glass tank and then pisses, shits and bleeds into it for days on end until he's nearly drowning.

StrangeSituation - a large glass tank hasn't been delivered in the last few days, has it???? You should tell us if it has - you may need emergency advice!

HeatherMills · 12/02/2008 23:06

i think it will be innocent
would love to see his work btw
am a bit of a collector myself....

KerryMum · 13/02/2008 00:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

madamez · 13/02/2008 01:09

While I have been having a good laugh reading this I do have to inform the OP that whatever else her DH is, he ain't original. THough I can;t provide a link as Googling him has not got me anywhere, I have donated my muff-fluff to an artist called Charles Sayer about 10 years ago: his speciality was paintings of fanjos and ringpieces adorned with real pubes.

LittleWonder · 13/02/2008 08:40

Muff-fluff!!!

schneebly · 13/02/2008 08:45

not read the whole thread but I am a natural blonde and have erm darker pubes - I once asked a couple of my clode friends and they are the same - think blonde pubes very uncommon so not likely to be real pubes I dont think

Baffy · 13/02/2008 09:35

any news...?

strangesituation · 13/02/2008 10:23

Am back.

Well I confronted DH last night in a rational "hey look what I found" last night sort of way. Think he was actually a little bit embarassed at the "new direction" his work has taken him as he has always been a little on the conservative side.

The blonde hair was actually from his friend "J" and wasn't his pubes but from his facial hair. DH was at J's house last week for a few beers and when he got there J was having a shave so DH asked if he could have the hair for some art work he was doing. He also admitted he had taken my clippings from the bin.

I actually feel quite shamful at how irrational I was yesterday. The fact that my clippings were gone from the bin made me go down the false trail of pubic hair and I never even thought of J who is blonde. . The very thought that I was even thinking of calling DH's female friend to ask if she had donated / find out what colour her ladygarden is makes me squirm with embarrassment .I don't think I will ever be able to look at her now without thinking about the pubegate saga

Thanks for all your advice. Am going back to my normal name now and am so glad none of you know who I really am

OP posts:
Baffy · 13/02/2008 10:28

great news

so glad you had a positive outcome

(was a great thread though! )

Blu · 13/02/2008 10:44

PMSL.

All's well that ends well.

redadmiral · 13/02/2008 10:52

Well it's been very enlightening re the 'collar and cuffs' of natural blondes.....

HappyWoman · 13/02/2008 10:55

So is there going to an auction of the said artwork. .

jellies · 13/02/2008 11:26

Ok I've tried to resist posting this but now its all resolved.. Don't open if you're easily offended or there are small children looking over your shoulder! LOL
Here