Celebrating big anniversary

[finalwhistle]

We are approaching our 25th wedding anniversary.

Last week my adult dd told me she would like to do a small party for us, which is a really kind thought. The problem is, our marriage is hanging on a thread and it feels inappropriate to "celebrate"!

She doesn't know this, as I don't involve our dc in our marital issues. She doesn't live with us so is blissfully unaware and I just don't know how to handle it 🤷🏼‍♀️

Tell her you've made other plans just the two of you, or have an honest convo with your husband and make a decision.

Be honest with her and tell her that you have some issues at the moment so it will be more helpful for you to have some time just the two of you together.
I wonder if she suspects something and wants to help the situation.

She put me on the spot really by asking what our plans were so she knows we don't have any 🤦‍♀️

A couple of years ago we attended a happy evening to celebrate some friends' silver wedding. It was one of these pop-up supper clubs and there were about 5 couples plus their two DC with their partners, who had organised the event.
It was only when they separated (convivially) six month later, it dawned on us that they each sat at the ends of the table, ostensibly to host us and that their speeches were referring to how proud they both were of their DC and how happy they were to see everyone, no mention of their love for each other etc.
What I'm getting at is that it was a lovely occasion and mostly done for their DC. As the (ex) wife now comments, it was even more special for her and (ex) husband as they knew there would be very few times the 'family' will be together in the future. Maybe go along with DD?

I'd just rather not pay it any attention tbh. I feel really sad that our marriage is in this state and having some kind of fake celebration would just shine a spotlight on it.