Can you explain why you’re in love?

[Ivefallen]

I have met someone - it’s my first relationship in over 15 years. I’ve always been happy to be single and have Fwb in those 15 years.

I am falling for him, but if you were to ask ‘why?’ I couldn’t tell you the answer. I mean I know he is kind, funny, hardworking, a great dad - but why am I drawn to him like this ?!

Is it normal? Am I thinking about this too much? Would you be able to explain why you’re in love?

Not really. He's alright. I'm alright. It works. Just enjoy it while it lasts.

Why do we love anyone?
I don’t think it’s a straight forward answer

I am in love with my dh he is amazing and so loving and makes me feel great and always there for me. It is the small things that matters.

Sounds like chemistry. It’s hard to argue with or explain. If you’re lucky it’ll last!

@MyMachineAndMe I like it, that’s how I kind of feel - I like him, he’s nice to be around and I want him to stay around forever!

@Prisonbreak you’re right, why do we?! Why isn’t it just ‘like’ ? I’m now going to think about this for far too long!

@Louisetopaz21 Your husband sounds lovely.

@AnneLovesGilbert I think you hit the nail on the head- chemistry! It’s weird, there’s no actually pinpoint moment/ thing that makes me feel like I’m falling in love - I just am.

I am in love with my OH because he has sexy muscles and he lets me touch them any time I want. He gives me amazing orgasms and packs my lunch.

I am besotted with the man!

I am in love with my dp because he is open, honest, loyal, genuine, we have fantastic chemistry, talk non stop about such a huge range of topics and I think he is sexy as hell. I Just absolutely adore everything about him.

Best answer.

I guess the real question OP is why do you think this is preoccupying you so much - is it a bad thing that you're in love? Or are you anxious that being too fond of this guy is going to mean getting hurt?

I’m not sure I believe in the concept of love. I’d say that lasting relationships are down to pheromones, compatible personalities and the ability to compromise!

I could give a whole list of reasons, from smelling good to letting me take the mickey to being very patient. But that would be more a retrospective justification, or a list of nice things, than actual reasons. There are of course other people out there with equally good qualities, who I didn’t fall in love with. So really, no idea!

There are many reasons why I fell in love with my husband (his humour, his forearms, his kindness, his brain), but countless more to explain why I stay in love with him. He is such a good man and always puts the children and I first. With him, I feel safe - I just can't explain it. It's not just security though, and even after 17 years, I never feel complacent. What's lovely is that we regularly tell each other how bloody lucky we feel to have each other and what we have together, and I think that recognition really helps.

My DH is funny and clever and kind. He puts socks on my feet when I’m cold and always gives me the best bits. He’s my favourite person. What’s not to love? 😁

Seriously, though, why are you analysing ‘why’ you love someone? To what end?

Hormones.

I see qualities in him I would strive for as I find them attractive. He's funny, brave, supportive and strong.

He also shares many qualities with me he's friendly, chatty, sensitive and strong willed.

We've been in each others lives my whole adulthood so he's been a constant but when I matured, thought about what was really impossible and put the time into allowing something to grow friendship became love.

He's the only person who "gets" me. Everyone else thinks I'm a bit of a wanker 😃💞

@TurnipSurprise
i love this!
my man also gives me amazing orgasms…
although I’m still a little shy around him!

That’s so lovely , being able to talk about everything is such a good thing. I was with someone for a while and we had so many awkward silences!!

He reminded me what it meant to feel safe. He makes me cry with laughter. He looks sexy as hell in grey. He's a kind and patient father. I'm excited to see him everyday and I miss him when we aren't together.
He brings joy to my soul and I love him so much I want to shout it from the rooftops.
God he's lush. Imma go kiss him.

@GoldenCupidon
i am soooo scared of it all!!

only one previous relationship before, very toxic - I’ve spent the last 15 years raising my children and ‘healing’.

I’ve had no interest in having a relationship. When we had our first date, I honestly thought it was going to be a Fwb situation but my heart is saying otherwise!! And it’s very scary!

When I realised I was in love with him, it was because he felt like home. Like I never needed to be a version of myself with him, he was where I went to just rest and be refilled.

Because my first impression was what a thoroughly decent human being he was, and thankfully still is. Home is where he is.