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Original poster

Other half bumped into an ex

14 replies

Snow34 · 02/03/2023 21:38

My other half bumped into his ex, it was our daughters birthday, we had a couple of friends with us. We were on our way out of flipout when he bumped into her, didn't introduce us, stood with his back to my friend and I after a couple of minutes waiting we took the kids to the toilet, he was still talking for another 5 mins and then my son went over to say we really needed to go and he still talked for another few minutes , went down stairs and he says oh my god this was our song we used to listen to this all the time when we were together. Later on my son told me his dad said to his ex if we bump into each other again we will have a proper chat. Normal or a bit odd? He said he doesn't fancy her at all anymore and it made him realise what he has, he was overly nice all day. When I bumped into my ex i introduced them both , we all talked together and then I said enjoy the rest of your day with the kids and that was it 🤷🏼‍♀️

OP posts:
Dacadactyl · 02/03/2023 21:43

I think because you are questioning it on here, something is not altogether right in your relationship.

I would've acted like you did if I bumped into an ex with my husband. However, I think the way he has acted is perhaps equally valid. Depends on personalities and how he usually would be if he bumped into an old friend for example.

Even if he does fancy her (and he must've done at one point), does it really matter?

How are things between you generally?

Original poster
Snow34 · 02/03/2023 21:51

Very up and down, we've been together years, to start with I didn't think much of it but when I mentioned it to a couple of friends they were like why would he say that and why would he not make the conversation short as we were on our way out, he didn't seem to want to leave.

OP posts:
Dacadactyl · 02/03/2023 21:53

Well the thing about saying it's their song was insensitive at best.

Only you know whether this is true to form for his behaviour.

I hope you get it sorted in your head.

Original poster
Snow34 · 02/03/2023 21:55

I didn't ask him if he fancied her , he randomly said 'I don't fancy her at all anymore' as we were walking to the car, just thought it was all a bit odd

OP posts:
Original poster
Snow34 · 02/03/2023 21:56

Dacadactyl · 02/03/2023 21:53

Well the thing about saying it's their song was insensitive at best.

Only you know whether this is true to form for his behaviour.

I hope you get it sorted in your head.

Thankyou

OP posts:
Whu · 02/03/2023 22:05

We all have a past and I don’t know anyone who has got back with an ex after meeting someone new, do you? It seems to be some sort of trope but not one that generally happens!
Yes, he probably does have some sort of fond feelings for her but then so do I about both my exes. It’s kind of a given when you’ve shared a life with someone, unless there was some sort of acrimonious break up or of course abuse or anything like that.
However saying that there are no circumstances that I would get back with either of my exes. I would have a friendly chat though.
Unless you have other concerns in your relationship I’d put it to the back of your mind.

Original poster
Snow34 · 02/03/2023 22:09

Whu · 02/03/2023 22:05

We all have a past and I don’t know anyone who has got back with an ex after meeting someone new, do you? It seems to be some sort of trope but not one that generally happens!
Yes, he probably does have some sort of fond feelings for her but then so do I about both my exes. It’s kind of a given when you’ve shared a life with someone, unless there was some sort of acrimonious break up or of course abuse or anything like that.
However saying that there are no circumstances that I would get back with either of my exes. I would have a friendly chat though.
Unless you have other concerns in your relationship I’d put it to the back of your mind.

👍

OP posts:
Neveragain85 · 02/03/2023 22:11

I think standing with his back to you & leaving you waiting was plain rude. He should have introduced you. I'd be feeling a bit off about that

Coyoacan · 02/03/2023 22:36

Well said, Whu.

Arrrrrrragghhh · 02/03/2023 22:57

J lo and Affleck ? Sorry not helping.

Who dumped who. If she dumped him it might be a bit of wishful thinking. I’d only worry if he made plans to see her more than once. He may just feel the need to sort out any unresolved bits.
If he dumped her then don’t worry at all.

Original poster
Snow34 · 03/03/2023 09:39

Arrrrrrragghhh · 02/03/2023 22:57

J lo and Affleck ? Sorry not helping.

Who dumped who. If she dumped him it might be a bit of wishful thinking. I’d only worry if he made plans to see her more than once. He may just feel the need to sort out any unresolved bits.
If he dumped her then don’t worry at all.

She asked him to meet him to sort things out at a certain day/time he went out with his mate instead so she left , he never made her a priority and took her for granted but I don't think he thought she would actually leave but didn't make an effort to get her back either, I found out they were still texting up until he started seeing me and then he didn't text her

OP posts:
YouAreNotBatman · 03/03/2023 10:37

So she knew she deserved better and you settled for less?
It doesn’t sound like he’s changed.

Original poster
Snow34 · 03/03/2023 11:28

YouAreNotBatman · 03/03/2023 10:37

So she knew she deserved better and you settled for less?
It doesn’t sound like he’s changed.

👍

OP posts:
GoodChat · 03/03/2023 11:45

I don't see the issue, apart from the song thing.

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