I met a woman through work around 5 years ago. We connected well as friends at the time. Since then we have both found new jobs. We still kept in touch. There were a few other woman part of this friendship group who are now all working together with this woman.
Previously, when we worked together we would meet up most weekends for drinks and something to eat at each others houses. We were all single at the time aside from this woman who was in an unhappy marriage so it suited us all at the time to fill our weekends and spare time with each other.
In the last 2.5 years I met someone and we struck up a relationship. We had both been through various battles in previous relationships including being cheated on and just generally taken for granted. We took time to get to know each other and moved in together last year. We are now expecting our first child and we and family are delighted for us.
Now is where I am seeking some advice; throughout my friendship with this woman she has always been rather opinionated about events in my life. Such as when i first started dating my partner and showed her a picture of him she said he has eyebrows like a clown. Then she didn't like my choice of partner because he is a police officer and she said all police officers 'were weirdos". Then it was she commented on our new house saying she wouldn't buy a mid terrace. These are only small examples but I can't help but feel her behaviour has changed since I met my current partner who by the way is a lovely man and kind and respectful and by no means a "weirdo". I would never tell my partner about her comments as they are unfounded and hurtful. She had a 40th birthday party and I didn't go as my dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer and wasn't keeping well. Her response was "I was looking forward to seeing you". She was meant to come over to see our house last week (as I'm typing this I can understand if people would think why am I still pursuing a friendship with this woman who is so clearly not a nice person) and on the day I didn't hear from her. When I text to see how she was and inadvertently query as to if she was able to make it she said she was in her bed loaded with the cold. It would have been nice of her to let me know but I let it go. The more ive thought about it the more I query whether this friendship brings anything positive to my life and is it worth it. May I add I had quite a tough time when I was single with my mental health and she was great and so supportive but can't help but feel now I am well and happy she isn't happy for me. I posted my pregnancy news in a group chat for the former girls I worked with including her and they were generic "that's nice" responses.
I guess I know what I should do but looking for the best way to terminate a friendship without causing major upset.
TIA 😊