Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Just stopped replying

15 replies

Dontfeedtheseagulls · 25/02/2023 07:39

Had a couple of dates with a guy last year. Fizzled out.

We got back in touch last week. He was warm, friendly and prompt on text until 5pm yesterday when he stopped replying mid conversation

He's been online since so he'll have seen my message

I don't imagine he will reply now and I won't text him again but why be friendly and warm then just go silent?

It's someone I live close to and it's just awkward now if I bump into him.

My final text was thanking him for something he'd done and asking his opinion on a joint contact we have (what do you make of John's big news)?

Crickets.

OP posts:
Drinknumber11 · 25/02/2023 07:59

I hate it when they do this! It’s happened to me loads and just makes me so anxious. It’s taken me a long time to come to terms with this behaviour.

He got back in touch again as he was keeping you as an option or someone to sleep with until someone he was more interested in came along. If a guy is truly interested in you they always find a way to keep in touch - it takes a few seconds to write a message.

Block and delete his number. I know you said that it would be awkward if you bumped into each other, but if he doesn’t respect you enough to have the courtesy to call things off then why are you worried about how he would feel?

Original poster
Dontfeedtheseagulls · 25/02/2023 09:53

Thanks @Drinknumber11 for understanding.

I know it's a regular thing that happens but it stings. I thought he was a nice guy and sorry for messing me around before.

Obviously not.

I've deleted his number and won't give him another chance.

OP posts:
TheAustralian · 25/02/2023 09:58

It seems to be a universal thing.
I had a chap I was talking too just disappear into thin air mid conversation. We had been chatting for about a month. We were in the middle of making plans to meet up when he went awol. He had the balls to come back 3 long years later like he had never been gone. Asking if we were still catching up on the weekend.
I told him I was banging his best mate, he never replied 😉

PrinceHaz · 25/02/2023 10:01

Block him.

Oneofakind1 · 25/02/2023 10:05

If they’ve done it once, they’ll do it again I’ve found. It’s how they operate. Not sure why. Don’t give them another chance in future.

Original poster
Dontfeedtheseagulls · 25/02/2023 11:28

@TheAustralian Three YEARS 😅

Yeah I'm pretty sure he knows I'd be up to meet up.

You find your mindmaking excuses for them that they can't even be bothered to make for themselves.

Like in my head he is taking time to think through his feelings and communicate meaningfully.

Even though I know he isn't. He is just rude and selfish and doesn't care about showing disrespect.

OP posts:
StopStartStop · 25/02/2023 11:30

I've deleted his number and won't give him another chance.

Superb.

MermaidEyes · 25/02/2023 11:45

TheAustralian · 25/02/2023 09:58

It seems to be a universal thing.
I had a chap I was talking too just disappear into thin air mid conversation. We had been chatting for about a month. We were in the middle of making plans to meet up when he went awol. He had the balls to come back 3 long years later like he had never been gone. Asking if we were still catching up on the weekend.
I told him I was banging his best mate, he never replied 😉

Three years?! Are you sure he wasn't abducted by aliens??

MyBloodyMaryneedsmoreTabasco · 25/02/2023 11:46

I do this to people sometimes. If the chat was general and his heart wasn't in it, you trying to prolong the texting with a query about someone else would have bored me senseless. Easier to ignore than say anything because if you do, people get weird.

Original poster
Dontfeedtheseagulls · 25/02/2023 11:51

Fair point @MyBloodyMaryneedsmoreTabasco . He had literally just met this other person though and texted me to say it had been a strange meeting. So my question was kind of a follow on to his first message rather than a subject change. I don't think I did anything wrong.

OP posts:
winterbegone · 25/02/2023 11:54

He wouldn't keep you waiting if he was that interested, probably just fishing for attention, just do the same when he eventually replies and keep it unanswered.

Annabananna1 · 25/02/2023 12:10

He probably had a boring afternoon and wanted some attention. Soon as something else came up he effed off. One thing for certain though, this is not any fault of yours - you are most likely brilliant and he is just an oblivious idiot. Don't dwell on it.

Original poster
Dontfeedtheseagulls · 25/02/2023 12:20

Thanks @Annabananna1 . I'm off to the beach then out with a friend tonight so will go back to enjoying my life instead of trying to understand this idiot

OP posts:
WidthofaLine · 25/02/2023 12:48

He's in a relationship.

He gets back in contact mid week and abruptly stops talking on Friday 5pm, no contact at the weekend, he'll probably pick back up on the Monday.

Maybe.

Original poster
Dontfeedtheseagulls · 25/02/2023 13:34

Could be @WidthofaLine ...though as a close neighbour I know he isn't living with anyone...but yes that's a possibility

I don't think he will be in touch...and I certainly don't think he'll explain or apologise so that's him out

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread