Me and my partner currently live in America. I enjoy it here, but recently I have been feeling homesick. I have rights to live in both countries, but grew up in the UK and majority of family are there. Recently, I've mentioned the idea of moving back to the UK to my partner. My partners response was that he has a great life here and is happy, and realistically doesn't know if he could give up everything in America to not lose me, if my desire to move back was inflexible and something I was set on. However, he was previously said he'd consider moving to the UK if it was literally something I was dead set on, he has friends there and has spent a lot of time there.
I can't get a definite answer, because he doesn't know, but he also hasn't said no. Just that he doesn't know if he would definitely do it, but the upshot of that is that it is something he would consider. But he did say that it would depend on how we did it, and that a job offer etc. would encourage him.
There are also benefits of the UK that he recognises, such as proximity to Europe, more vacation, better work /life balance.
I am basically asking him to consider something 3/4 years down the line. We would have been together 7 or so years by then and we'd be looking at engagement/marriage. I don't know whether to be completely discouraged by his answer, or just accept that is something he would consider and that it might have to be enough for now. And in reality, this is quite a while down the line. I'm not even entirely certain that I will want to move back, although I know I don't want to live in America forever.
It's a complex situation and I feel like I'm causing issues by bringing it up; I have always tried to be honest with him about the fact I may not want to stay in America forever, but it's only recently that I've mentioned I occasionally feel the urge to move back in the next 3/4 years.
Aside from this, our relationship is literally perfect. We've been dating 3 and a bit years, and we are somewhat the same person. I can't imagine being so compatible with someone else, and my partner has also said that this is one reason why we would figure it out and he has also said that if I did want to move back, it doesn't mean he'd automatically want to end it.
We are both very aware of this. I just feel a bit insecure and sad about it today. AIBU to have some hope and not feel completely doomed? AIBU to think we will figure it out somehow, and that this isn't an insurmountable issue?
For added context, he loves the city, but his family live in a part of the US he would never consider life in and he is not close to them and already content with seeing them
1/2 times a year, so moving to Europe wouldn't present much of a difference in terms of how often he sees his family. He doesn't love the US, just specifically the city. We are also financially stable and have some flexibility with that, both have careers that are international, etc.
For context, we're currently both mid 20s, and really only just solidified our careers. It's also hard to make a decision this big at a young age, I understand. But see above about being financially stable and having supportive family, including financially, ie, access to early inheritance if needed.
I am also well aware something else could knock our relationship out- but it seems unlikely given we've been dating three years and it's consistently stable. If it wasn't for this issue, I'd see no reason why one of us would end it.