Please can anyone help or advise as I’m so lost as to what to do anymore with regards to my partner. He is controlling but he does it in such a covert manipulative way I didn’t actually realise I was being controlled until the last year. He has all these unspoken/unwritten rules made up and if me or the children don’t abide by it we are in the wrong.
One incident this evening made me lose it as I just quite simply had enough. He has this rule where our daughter can’t go on her phone until 7pm, that’s not the issue at hand although he just makes these decisions all the time without speaking to me regarding the children.
The problem caused tonight was apparently I didn’t adhere to the rule as I let her go on it to finish watching 10 minutes of a movie on Netflix we were watching earlier and her baby brother was watching something on the TV so I said she could have the phone to finish the movie. He comes charging down, questioning me in front of her “why is she on the phone?” I explained my thinking and he wasn’t listening and started saying no she can’t have the phone at all now! which in turn made her upset and she burst into tears so then he started shouting at her which I then told him to stop and I shouted out of frustration and apparently now he’s so angry at me that I shouted and he’s not talking to me or the children and is giving us all the silent treatment simply because he wants to always dictate how we live our lives and control such trivial things. He doesn’t care about the impact it’s having on the kids and I’m just so done. How is he able to twist things everytime to make me look like the one who’s done something wrong and when I react to his controlling behaviour I am the issue??!!