What to think?

[solosunflower]

Last July I walked out on my partner. We'd been together three years. He has issues with weed, and all his promises to cut down/stop came to nothing. A few weeks later I found out I was pregnant (he has no children and this is my first at 38). I tried to tell him, but he'd blocked me on everything. Eventually I went around to his house ( some time in September). He wouldn't open the door, so I went round the back and found the patio open. He basically said he wanted nothing to do with I or the baby, then closed the patio door on my fingers because he wanted to go back in for a smoke. I've heard nothing since. All after saying he wanted to get married, loved me etc. I don't expect to ever hear from him again in my lifetime.

I know I'm going to get shot down in flame, but I feel so desperately alone and want to meet someone else.

Thanks for reading.

I hate to say it but I think you need to put a pin in the idea of meeting someone else for now. Probably for at least the next 3 years. Give or take a little.

Focus on friendships. Maybe join a few meetup(.com) groups to meet new folk. Journalling might help you too FYI.

Also, you need to determine if you are just lonely or if this is a self esteem thing. Because dating is not going to help you with low self esteem. You'll only attract more losers and predators.

Did you continue with the pregnancy?

Yes, I am 33 weeks today

I actually conceived that last time we had sex.

You did the right thing by splitting up with this man. Keep telling yourself that.

You have plenty of time to meet someone new and have a loving relationship, but you're not in the right place emotionally at the moment. Do you have family around to support you when baby arrives?

My family are fairly toxic, so I try to keep my distance. I have a few work friends. I'm hoping I can make some mum friends via groups etc.