Worried about my decision

[Arewethereyetx]

I think I have been unhappy for a little while in my marriage and have spent some time weighing up my options. I think my husband is emotionally abusive. He regularly gives me the silent treatment over decisions I make he doesn't agree with. I worry about asking him to do things with my family as he hates it. He has recently given my daughter the silent treatment for more than a day but then accused me of telling her he is horrible.
We are never intimate anymore and I honestly don't think he loves me anymore
I have been to see a solicitor for some advice and have started thinking about my life in a years time and what it could look like.
We have 2 children both primary school age so I worry so much about them.
I have had a small conversation with him last night where I said we are struggling, and maybe we should separate.
I am really worried about actually saying that is my decision! Anyone been through it, I am so scared of saying the actual words.

I think you’re right, it’s the end. I couldn’t live with someone who gives me and my dd the silent treatment, that’s so foul. Get out, you surely will be better off without him.

I thought about it for aggggggessss and was quite noticeably miserable but I couldn't actually go through with it. One night he started the convo/argument and I just admitted, yes I wanted it to end. Such a relief. I felt amazing after.

When I left my ex husband, who was abusive, my son said it was the best thing that I could have done. my DS was 12 at the time. Now 24.

is telling your DH, and the fear of his reactions, the reason you are worried?
You do not own your life to someone regardless of how they treat you. If you feel that the weight on your shoulders will lift once you have told him, and left him you know you made the right decision. If you think there is something left in the marriage to work on, then you have the option to explore that, but if the thought of staying is leaving you anxious then you know you are on the right track. It sound like you just need confirmation that its ok to leave, and it is.

Keep imagining what your life will be like in 2 years and how much happier you will be not having to pander to an emotionally abusive DH.

Remember also that your DDs will regard your relationship as a model for relationships. They will learn that it’s okay for women to be very unhappy in long-term relationships. It’s a bad message to send.