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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Situationship and miscarriage

4 replies

Toria1980 · 11/02/2023 22:13

So I met a guy on tinder 12 months ago - went on a few dates and was purely sexual as he was scared to commit so I ended up getting in another relationship - fast forward to august 2022 relationship ended and got back in touch with the tinder guy . We ended up in an intense situationship said we loved each other we went shopping, on dates and he was like my best friend. He wouldn’t label us though as he felt it would spoil things - anyway around Christmas I found out I was pregnant - he didn’t want a kid but accepted my decision to keep it. He would constantly be saying oh we r going to be single parents again making it clear we weren’t going to be in a relationship. My hormones were all over the place and got upset and told him I didn’t want to communicate with him anymore so blocked him. As soon as I did this he started to add loads of random woman on tiktok etc and posting flirty videos … I text him again a very nasty message . 1 week later and I started to bleed and miscarry( at ten weeks) I messaged him to tell him and he totally blanked me - no contact atall. I know I may have overacted my hormones were crazy - I had to go through the miscarriage alone which has broke me. I have lost my baby and him and I feel so stupid and alone- breakups are hard but losing the baby as well this pain is another level :( any advice ladies ?

OP posts:
Ofcourseshecan · 11/02/2023 22:21

I’m so sorry you miscarried, OP. But your bf behaved despicably.

I know it hurts now, but you are better off without a man who would block you when you were miscarrying his child. I hope you find a better partner later. Right now, just look after yourself and give yourself time to heal.

winterbegone · 11/02/2023 22:39

Sorry for your loss. See him as what you don't want in future, dont get involved with men that don't like you enough to label a relationship with you, be extra careful about pregnancy until you are sure you are in a stable connection. You have the chance to make life how you want it.

Summer2424 · 11/02/2023 22:57

Hi @Toria1980 i'm so sorry you're going through this x
The Tinder guy sounds horrible.
Please stay strong, you have been through a miscarriage, please look after yourself xx

Thewheelweavesasthewheelwills · 11/02/2023 23:20

I am so sorry for what you are going through. MC is very awful, make sure to look after yourself well during this time.

He sounds like a complete plank. You deserve better.

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