I've been married to DH for 7 years now. Even at the beginning we were never one of those couples who were all over each other - we have a great emotional and intellectual connection and the physical connection has always been secondary to that. When we have sex I do enjoy it and he's considerate and attentive but I rarely feel spontaneously like doing it. I do find him objectively handsome enough but without the urge to rip his clothes off or anything. There are certain mannerisms of his that just put me off slightly from finding him super-attractive eg he has this habit of talking to me in a similar voice to how you'd talk to a baby. Increasingly I'm finding these mannerisms are giving me a bit of the ick and it will put me right off sex or even finding him very attractive. He's not the stereotypical 'masculine' kind of guy which I know is silly but also somewhat puts me off, like I'd love him to just ogle me or spontaneously start kissing me on the couch but he never does. I also don't feel that desired by him either - I don't know if he has a lower libido compared to others I've been with or maybe he doesn't find me super-attractive either!
How can this be reconciled? Is there a way to make myself find him very attractive? I'm not repulsed by him by any means and he's a kind, loving and generous partner and our relationship is very healthy in all other ways except this aspect which I'm struggling with.