No he’s wrong but keep going back

[Lizzybizz123]

A bit long winded but I have been in an on/off relationship for 4 years we don’t live together I’m 47 he’s 54 we both have late teens x 2 not together, at first he was everything I dreamt of but then he started to show his true colours he’s selfish and very spoilt for a grown man…. He isn’t an alcoholic but has some issues with binge drinking then lies to cover it all up, he can be spiteful when drinking…. Our relationship has never moved on to the next stage I think because he likes me to be totally independent of him yet have me to himself, he’s not particularly well liked and I can see why….. he has good points of course but just not many….. I keep trying to leave for good but always end up going back as I miss him, I haven’t been shown much love in my past and he is affectionate and makes me feel loved, I try to move on but fail every time I just feel like I’m flogging a dead horse there’s no future in us…. But I’m stuck!! 🥲

I mean, it seems obvious that this isn't a good relationship and you know you should end it. What's stopping you?

You are the person who needs to make yourself feel loved. Then you won't feel like you need him.

In your position I'd see about taking a holiday. Perhaps some sort of adventure element to it. Or maybe doing something brave on the holiday like bungee jumping.

Sun and adventure, to help you rebuild your self esteem. To show you you are capable without him.

A spa, haircut and clothing makeover might help too.

You need to refind your self love.
That'll make it easier to walk away from people who don't value you as you deserve.

Love this advice