Pregnant and stressful friends

[sweetpotato29]

I'm currently 6 weeks pregnant with our 1st so obviously really early days right now and anxiously hoping everything will be ok.

I'm bridesmaid for two friends - one wedding happening in July and one in August. The July one has a bridesmaid dress fitting coming up soon which she'd like me to go to (and I do want to go!) but one of the other bridesmaid's is incredibly nosey and blunt. She will ask outright 'why aren't you drinking? Are you pregnant?' And whatever I say will be like 'sureeee' 'yeah whatever you're pregnant'. Then corner me alone at some point and say 'just be honest with me, you are aren't you?' I know this because she's done it before when we were still TTC.

I don't know whether to go to it, the thought of that is really putting me off but I don't want to let the bride down (who I know would never question me about it). It's really stressing me out and I keep changing my mind about it. The appointment is a 2 hr train journey away (each way) with a change so not particularly easy to get there... what do I do?

Also don't get me started on the hen do looking like a boozy one abroad with an equally difficult journey there and back!

I get these a friends getting married, but right now, YOU and that bump are number 1.
I’m not saying drop everything, but a good friend will understand when you need to take it easy.

That blunt friend: be blunt back and tell her to mind her own business. No one has a right to that kind of nosiness. It’s very wrong to quiz people about being pregnant - who knows what they’re going through.

I'd be more worried about going to a dress fitting knowing good and well it likely won't fit by the wedding. Don't go make an excuse. Schedule a different date for you about a week or two before the wedding

I agree with pp, what's the point of going for a fitting now when you'll be massive by June. Waste of time and effort. Not to mention money. Just tell them.

Thanks all. I did worry about the dress not fitting too, but hoped it could be let out (I'd take it to a seamstress myself). But maybe getting it fitted now would make it more difficult for the bride.

Looks like not going would probably be the smartest thing to do. I just hate letting people down!

And yes I know the nosiness is bad... I don't think she means anything bad by it, it's just how she is. I can't deal with it right now though

Well I’d tell her in advance and say that you don’t want it to be public knowledge so appreciate it if she kept it quiet amongst friends. To be honest though women of a certain age not drinking when they usually do, everyone always suspects pregnancy. So if you really want to keep it 100% quiet I’d be unwell on the day

This is the thing, I would if I trusted her not to tell anyone else but unfortunately I don't. All our friends would end up knowing. My sister doesn't even know yet so that just feels wrong to me. Plus we want to be the ones to tell everyone ourselves (providing everything goes ok & if it didn't I wouldn't be telling my friends!)