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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Why? I never learn!

2 replies

foolisharies · 31/01/2023 12:10

I never learn; ever from my mistakes. I have been OLD on and off for the past 3 years and I keep doing the exact same thing over and over again! I get sucked into sending sexual images and phone sex. Even when I meet the guy, I end up having zero self control when he initiates even though at times I feel uncomfortable.

My on and off ex of 3 years left me with bruises, manipulated and cheated on me. Heck, I didn't know he was married with 2 kids within the first year of our relationship.

I feel like such a failure, used and then thrown out. Why am I not respecting myself? I never block the ones that treat me badly either!

How do I change? I'm so so tired!

OP posts:
PollyDarton1 · 31/01/2023 12:12

Honestly, come off OLD.

Set yourself a small target - 3 months or so. Focus on the things you enjoy, see the people who make you happy, read "The Joy of Being Single" and perhaps engage in therapy around relationships and attachments.

QueenConsort · 31/01/2023 12:20

Yes- get off there until you are feeling stronger.

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