I'm sorry for what you have gone through. One of the shittiest things about having wounds from our parents is that we believe what they said to us about ourselves. If they, who brought us into the world think so of us, they who should supposedly love us unconditionally see us this way how can anyone else love us? This is a very difficult belief to disentangle yourself from but it is very possible.
I don't know if you've done any or much therapy and there are many types but I had a similar issue with my parents and my psychotherapist did inner child work with me. I later found a lot more info about this type of therapy in self help books and on social media. It helped me understand that the way they treated me was a reflection on them rather than me or my value and worth as a person. I had internalised the message that I wasn't worthy of love, there was something fundamentally wrong with me when really, 'normal', emotionally sound parents don't make their child feel this way. I later found out my parents had difficult and unloving childhoods with one parent being the black sheep of the family. They raised me the way they were raised in the way they knew. I'm not even sure they had the awareness of how wrong it was.
Your description of parents who gave you things but not what you needed emotionally reminded me of the stately homes thread on Relationship board, I believe. If you search from it it should come up. There will be people who went through a similar experience.
You are 37, still young with so much life yet to live. Relationships success is partly luck and also depends on the other person being decent and truthful. They are 50-50. Of course, it's a huge help when you come from a place of healthy self esteem and having had a good childhood with great role models and can spot any red flags a mile off, but most of us have some damage or issues, most of us experience disappointment and heartbreak. People can change and disappoint us. What I'm saying is what happened with your ex could have happened to someone else with loving parents. It could have been due to anything that you ended up with someone who turned out to be unsupportive so please see it as a lesson rather than a stick to beat yourself with. You've beaten yourself up enough for multiple lifetimes. Self compassion, which to me is treating myself like a good friend or my child, mothering yourself again even when you don't believe you deserve it until you see that you do deserve it.
It's normal to have down days, it's good to feel your feelings but it's also important to try and balance this by reminding yourself of all the positives in your life, such as a child(ren?), job, friendships. Physically running away doesn't solve the inner demons, you can't escape your head. You can find freedom and peace right where you are if you work on dismantling the messages that are holding you down. It takes work but it is achievable. There are so many people who have a similar experience, you're not alone. There are people who understand.
Just to add on a practical note, you might already know of Child Maintenance Service collecting child support from your ex without you having to communicate with him about it. You might like books by Brene Brown and Louise L Hay and lastly that you don't have to stay in touch with your parents, going low or no contact is an option.