When is the last time you and your partner had a proper cuddle?

[StarSol]

My partner and I have been together for 13 years and married for 7. We have an 18 month old.

I was thinking about this recently as ever since husband and I had our daughter we kind of went into survival mode because she was very sick for awhile. I think for the first three months of her life we didn't even touch each other other than goodnight kisses. She was a preemie and had very high needs! It was really rather depressing If I'm being honest. At six months we started hugging and kissing again and sometimes we would even have sex once or twice a month! 😂

At one year we started gradually having sex more frequently but it was not how it was pre baby for obvious reasons. It was very much "quick! She's napping! Let's get it done before she wakes up or we might not get a chance for another week!" 😂🤷🏻‍♀️ but before there would be lots of stary eyes, staring lovingly at each other, kissing touching and of course the cuddling! The cuddling was usually what started everything. Aw the cuddling.

We've cuddled occasionally but it wasn't a GOOD cuddle you know? Maybe this is just my personality but I've very into cuddling. Maybe I'm cuddle-sexual. Add that to the list LGBTQ+!

Anyways we used to regularly cuddle anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour a day. Often first thing in the morning and of course at night. I like to cuddle in very intimate positions like a full blown lemur embrace. Arms and legs wrapped around holding each other very tight breathing in each others existence.

Anyways we had a GOOD long comfy cuddle this morning with no sexual expectations and it was like something was released within me. It was so nice. It left me wondering why we ever stopped doing that! My husband promptly reminded me of the toddler sleeping in the next room was what happened and we very much had other things on our minds so it was only natural things were disrupted for awhile. I very much plan to bring this back permanently.

I require high quality cuddles on a regular basis! It does not have to be every day but I'm hoping for 3-4 times a week minimum!

What about you guys? Did you stop cuddling? Were you never a cuddly couple to begin with? If you stopped cuddling did you ever start again. Are you too cuddle-sexual? 🧐

We always cuddle in bed and sleep spooning or wrapped around each other in some way. We’ve been together 25years.

I adore cuddling! I have none from my husband at all, and this thread has made me feel a little sad. I have hugs from colleagues and friends (they have been carefully chosen over the years, I don't just randomly hug anyone!) but it's not quite the same.

It's really the best. Deep snuggles are vital for some marriages. 🥰

New year's eve I think. During our annual kiss.

We were a very cuddly couple. I used to sleep every night with DH's arm across me, before I met him I was never a particularly cuddly person and very much preferred my own space in bed but things were different with him. I reckon the lack of the weight of his arm on me is just one of the reasons I no longer sleep well.

I don't need to breathe in his existence, I can hear him snoring/see him gallumphing around most of the live long day.

I don't even like the word cuddle. I also never say I love you. OP, you'd hate being married to me. My currency is sarcasm and scepticism.

Today when DH got home, not for an hour though, we don't have time for that! Every night in bed though, and at least once or twice during waking hours and I do miss it when DH is working away. Strange really as I've never been a cuddly person, only really felt the need in the last few years, coinciding with perimenopause now I think of it. I used to cuddle DD a lot when she was younger (she's not keen now she's a teenager) but have never really been cuddly with anyone else including DH til the last few years. Think DH must have felt a bit cuddle-deprived prior to that as he likes it even more than me.

He sounds wonderful!

This morning, extra-long because I was already asleep when he came to bed last night.
And a few quick hugs during the day. Been together more than 20 years and couldn’t do without cuddling.

I think I'm much like you. Lol. I would have said the same thing. Our baby was just so sick and had to be fed every 2-3 hours because she was sooooo little. She was released as soon as she weighed the minimum weight for her car seat which was 4lbs. 🥲 but that also meant she needed to be fed constantly or she would start to lose weight! 😩 we tried formula to take the pressure off my boobs and to fatten her up a little bit but her body did not agree with that stuff so it was exclusive breastfeeding whether I liked it or not! There was a point that I just walked around topless with sore boobs and in a zombified state constantly. Loooooll.

Hubby was on full time diaper duty which was nice. But because our baby was very needy and hungry she couldn't cope with being set down EVER. So if hubby was working and I had to pee she cried. Make lunch? Listen to crying while making a sandwich. Need to get dressed? Crying while getting dressed. It didn't end for six months! Postnatal depression probably didn't help this.

We ended up taking turns holding her and at one point I would watch her during the day so DH could sleep and he would watch her at night so I could sleep. That was the only way either of us could function. Oh and logging apps because there's no way you're going to remember the last diaper change or feed when youre running on 5 hours of sleep. Lol

While she was an adorable newborn I'm much happier with the toddler stage. She is loving life, running around and it's very fun to play with her. Oh and she sleeps in her crib at night. 😂

🤣🤣

That gave me a lump in my throat.
Sorry they are no longer there

I'm cuddle deprived. I have been single too long and had a friend who gave great cuddles. Nothing sexual at all, just a lovely way to let each other know we were physically there for each other too
But we fell out and only have my dog to cuddle now. Makes me sad I miss being held

That's terrible. I do hope you meet someone and your near future and full of plenty happy cuddles!

Aaah I have found my tribe!! I’m with you guys on this.

@PacificallyRequested i laughed at the karate chop comment 😂😂

I’m so glad to read this! I was reading the thread thinking there’s something wrong with me. I don’t like ‘cuddles’ at all. Never have. A hug can be nice.