When to tell the kids we are separating

[Liveyourlife1]

We have decided to end our marriage.

We are putting the house up for sale and going to continue living together while the sale completes and then we will each move into our new places.

When do we tell the kids? They will see the for sale sign go up so will know we are moving but it will likely take months to complete.

Neither of us are in a position to move out immediately.

Any advice welcome. Dreading telling them.

How old are they?

They are 4 and 8.

Is tell them asap.
Our small ones were that age when we split up and we did that. 4 year old was fine and remains fine to this day. Then 8 year old was very very upset and angry and went through all the emotional cycles we expected. I am glad we were open with her early rather than leaving her to make up things in her mind- which are inevitably always worse. And remember kids blame themselves. So holding off will make your children question themselves and their part even more. IMO.

I'd tell them in age-appropriate ways what is going to happen.

Maybe they could even go along to respective viewings and treat it more as a positive than terrible thing? So they know where they'll be going when they're with each parent and what to expect a bit.