I realise it's the middle of January but still really bothered by things that happened over Christmas with 2 DSis. Also since Christmas I've hardly heard from them. If it's relevant this was the first Christmas for me on my own with DC after separation last year.
Firstly I arranged with DSis1 who has a young baby to stay over in the holidays. All arranged and fine. I also arranged for our other DSis2 to come and visit. On the day, DSis2 didn't turn up and blamed the train strikes. My DC was so bitterly disappointed. No worries I told my DSis I understood so made the most of DSis1 staying. DC happy enough.
Next day DSis1 went to visit DSis2. I only found out through my parents as DSis1 collected presents for Dsis2. Nothing mentioned to me.
For Christmas day I had arranged for my DC dad to spend the day with us. I told DSis1 and said I would plan to visit DPs in the evening to break up the day. Obviously I felt so anxious about the whole thing being the 1st Christmas separated. Ex and I coparent well but it's all still very raw for me about the marriage breakdown.
In the run up to Christmas, DSis1 mentioned a few times coming to mine after Ex leaves for "moral support". Each time I said thanks and that I was grateful for support but also mentioned that I had planned to visit DPs instead. Each time she didn't listen then started telling my DPs that she would see them at mine on Christmas day. I ended up having to tell my DF that this wasn't the plan and I felt much better with the prospect of visiting DPs after Ex leaves on the day. Within all of this DSis admitted that she didn't want to visit DPs and preferred to meet my DPs at my house, no more mention of moral support for me!
On Christmas Eve I texted her to confirm that I was going to DPs so we could meet there. Rang her to confirm it too and I was assertive to tell her enough that I had said this a few times over. Her reaction was a tirade of text messages - not worhh repeating but so utterly passive aggressive I couldn't even reply.
Since then no other contact from her, absolutely no moral support in fact which she was so adamant she was providing. In fact I hate to admit that each time I've confided in her about my marriage breakdown, I see the sneer underneath the sympathy. I've texted twice in the last weeks to say hello and met with bland responses. I want to be the bigger person who doesn't fall out over little things. Equally she has form for this sort of thing especially at Christmas and has been quite a toxic person in the past.
Should I just stop wasting my time and effort with DSis as feel she doesn't really care or am I right to try and remain civil for the sake of keeping the peace and my DC relationships with relatives?
Thanks for reading!