Can you be in love with someone but have to end a relationship?

[Flowertop123]

That's all I'm asking really -

Can you be in love with someone but have to end a relationship, due to external factors or pressures on the relationship?

I always think if you love someone you make the relationship work regardless. Or has anyone been in a situation where love just isn't enough?

It’s absolutely ok to do this OP. At the six month mark you shouldn’t feel stressed about the relationship.

it is so difficult when you love the other person. But you need to do what is right for you.

I have recently ended my 6 year (on/off) relationship even though I love him. Love has never been the problem, there are just things he does that I can't and won't live with (constantly losing jobs, having zero ambition etc) so I made the decision to end things for good. It's shit, but I don't regret doing it.

Yes, definitely. Felt the same way about him at the end of our relationship as I did in the beginning, but I had to accept I didn't 'fit' into the life he wanted to live. Neither of us where living the lives we wanted to be but I had the courage to end it. I still love him to this day and I'm glad he is happy (heard through the grapevine).

So it's definitely over despite the mutual love. Too many issues he needs to resolve and so no time for me emotionally. That's it.
Devastated absolutely devastated.

Op I'm sorry your relationship has ended. Mine has too, although I love my ex dp very much. However, I value a life of contentment and peace more than any man. The right relationship, I believe, will bring that. If a relationship is stressful and difficult it's not the right one. There is much in life that can bring happiness, and men aren't the be all. Just my thoughts.

We are going through the same, recently decided to separate but still love each other very much. I don't know how it is going to affect me when we are no longer living together and part of each others daily lives. I imagine it will break my heart even more when that does happen but we both know it is for the best. It helps when the decision is a mutual one.

Yes. I loved my ex partner so so much on the day I split with him. It’s complicated about summed us up. It shouldn’t have been but I never felt that he was 100% in it (even after 3.5 years). Maybe because he said he didn’t want a relationship from the start. Maybe because roughly every 6 months we’d end up having a huge row because I’d feel he’d stood me up, wasn’t prioritising me etc.. He’d be all hurt but seemingly reasonable and eventually I’d calm down but nothing ever quite got fixed.

The last time he stood me up (for reasons he thought were totally valid) I shouted, he did the hurt thing. We cancelled a holiday because he wasn’t really speaking to me (whilst not entirely ignoring me!). I held out a very large olive branch and he wished me a merry Xmas in response so I told him it was done. I didn’t want to be friends either. Since then he’s told me our sex issues were all as a result of him not wanting the strings of a relationship with me and asked me to be his fuck buddy. I guess this rather removed the scales from my eyes. He isn’t what I thought. Still hurts to see his photo but I’m ignoring it HARD.

I went internet dating, met a guy for a few dates and he is a breath of fresh air. Wants to see me, makes concrete plans, compliments me, wants sex… I am definitely not expecting the new guy to be The One or anything but it is lovely not to be playing stupid arse games and just to have a nice time (don’t worry, I’ve been honest with new guy about wanting to just date for now!)

So yes I loved the idiot when I dumped him. I probably still do but in the words of Taylor Swift… we are never ever getting back together!! They have to be good for you for you to love them sadly.

DON’T have to be good for you..

How 'in love' with this person can you really be after 6 months? Unless you've known them for years before hand 6 months isn't long enough to even know someone.

I'd known him for 2 years before we got together and had got to know him pretty well to judge he was right for me.

No advice, sorry. Just to say I’m here right now. Except it hasn’t ended. Yet. We are limping towards it and it’s killing me.

I love this man like nobody else. (I’m 48 so feel I can say this). Love has probably kept us together a year longer than we should. I just know when it ends I’ll never see him again. It’ll be like he died.

I really feel for you and wish you love and strength.

“If you get your relationship advice from Disney and Hallmark, yes, love is enough.

IRL boundaries, money, faithfulness, addiction, life goals, family issues, work, a thousand things need to work in order to make relationships healthy. 6 months in no one should be anyone's rock and place to put all their stuff. Even 6 years in you'd want to be careful about that.

It really is better to have loved and lost. That feeling is still wonderful, even when it hurts. But if it doesn't work, it doesn't work, regardless of the love there.”

This. Sorry, OP - it sucks.

Yes I've finished things with someone I loved (and still love).
He wasn't good for me, he was secretive and dependant. Our relationship wasn't going anywhere. He was making my life worse not better. It was absolutely the right decision, but it still hurts. I'm fine r we IHT the pain, it reminds me to look after myself and life is exciting still, there will be others.

absolutely

Yup and heartwrenchingly painful. Going through it now and feeling lost is an understatement.
Been (was) in a relationship with guy for just over 2 years. Known him since we were 12 (now 34). Had a short relationship when we were 18/19 when then bf left me. Stupidly, I got back with then bf and even married him and 1 DD. This meant contact with friend reduced greatly but he would always check on me via texts but very platonic.
Fastforward 3 years ago, I finally seperated from exH but not divorced yet (another story) but we still lived together. Guy contacted me on bday and we started chatting again. We met 6 months after and realised we still had a spark.
However, we both still lived with our other half. He was not married but had an ex with a DD. My exH finally moved out approx 18 months ago, plan was he did the same and hand on heart he took steps towards that. This sunday he spoke to his DD re moving and all hell broke loose. His DD is a daddys girl, they do everything together plus I believe she was under the assumption her parents were a couple despite knowing me. His Ex knew of the plan and her reponse was around finances. Monday we both cried as I just couldn't see a way forward. I know he did the honourable thing being there for his child but I'd be lying if i said I'm not devastated. My friends and family adore him. He went above and beyond for me. He made me feel safe which was always a key thing for me. I work in a role where I help people reassess their lives (not wanting to give much away) and I'm just stumped.
I have to respect his decision to be there for his child and I plan on just working on myself and just taking each day as it comes. I just worry re what I will do when he contacts me again.