How much do you tell adult DCs?

[GnomeDePlume]

About personal finances? Just interested to read other perspectives.

DH and I (mid 50s) are about to get our powers of attorney set up. We already have wills in place.

Recent family illnesses have made us realise how easily the life admin merry-go-round is knocked off its axle if the ones who do the admin aren't around to explain things.

My plan is to put together a notebook with all relevant account numbers, insurance policy numbers etc so that whoever is having to pick up the reins has it all to hand. We will also include a rough idea of what different things are worth so that DCs (our executors and attorneys) can work out what to deal with.

Once done I will talk DCs through it then tell them where they can find it. It isn't millions but with a house, pension fund, life insurance, Death in Service benefit it adds up.

Has anyone else done similar or different but with the same end in sight?

It’s something I keep meaning to do but haven’t got round to! I’ve done the Will and LPAs.

important to list passwords I think - my DB had a nightmare with this when his DW fell in then died

*ill

Passwords would make me nervous. I trust the DCs but what if someone else got hold of a neatly written set of account codes & policy numbers plus passwords?

You might find this helps to write things down. Also includes funeral wishes.

www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/money-legal/end-of-life-planning/lifebook/

I haven’t actually given my adult children my passwords but they do know where they can find a list of my accounts and a rough amount of how much they contain.

Then at least when I die they will be able to contact financial institutions with death certificate probate form and access the money.

You could register with a service like life ledger to keep it all in one place. And to make it as easy as possible for the DC

Your plan sounds fine. I would share broad details of your assets and testamentary arrangements - so Wills and any trust arrangements. Make sure they know where the original documents are, and make sure you review them regularly.

You don't need to share passwords but make sure they know where you have accounts, particularly online ones that you don't necessarily get paper statements for.

If you do any gifting keep a good record of this.

If you do all of that, you'll be doing a lot better than a lot of people!

You won't need to give passwords - they won't be accessing any accounts as though they are you.

When you pass away all the companies will follow a bereavement process, they won't require your password. You can use the 'tell us once' service when someone passes which sends a notification to all banks ect, they then contact you to arrange closing accounts ect.

Our adult DC's are Executors of our Wills. They know exactly where we keep all our paperwork on everything, all filed, for whenever they need it.

DH and I hold POA for each other, and the geographical-nearest son is our back-up POA in case we both become incapacitated .

Husband and I both have those LifeBooks, they're very good. Passwords are saved on a password protected file (the irony!) which lives on an external hard drive which lives in metal box along with wills, livings wills and POA's. Share appropriately with each child when they are of an age to deal with it, but when either husband or I pass then it will be a more specific conversation.

My best friend knows where everything is too.

They know everything ...

My parents in their late 80s/early 90s have just done this for me.
Their password reminders they had written down were too cryptic for me however!
50s seems quite young to be doing this to me, but maybe that's because I still have my DPs.

I don't think age should come into it...DS Dad died totally unexpectedly at the end of November, he was mid 40's.

My parents and in laws have both done this.

They have told us where key documents are, let us know key wishes etc.

I'm really pleased they've done this. We are a lot clearer on what they want to happen.

It's made DH and I talk about it all as well. We've discussed wishes should anything happen.

Death is the only guarantee in life. We need to talk about it openly.

DS knows where the copy of our will is and we have a filing cabinet with everything in labelled files. Far better than when my DF died and I found paperwork in boxes all over the house.

Thank you, glad to know we arent being totally weird!

We have been prompted by a family member having suffered an incapacitating stroke in their early 50s. This is causing a nightmare for their adult children.

Having administered 3 estates the easier you can make things for your loved ones the better IMHO. Having to go through years of papers shoved in boxes is very upsetting as you then discover things that you wish you hadn’t. Eg family member struggling financially who we would have willingly helped had they confided in us.