An ex has emailed out of the blue

[chocolateaddict231]

Hi ladies,

I hope you're well. I'm just a little confused so thought here might give me some clarity as friends have pre determined ideas about the situation.
I was with someone (very much on and off) for two and a half years. He had a lot of problems with commitment and was hot and cold. Everyone told me to walk away, but I kept letting him back, trying my best to make it work. When the pandemic hit I think he felt lonely and suddenly wanted to make it work with us, I tried for a while but I had a lot of resentment and the whole thing became toxic (I contributed to that too and regret the things I said sometimes).

It ended badly and I stopped responding to him as it was best for both of us. I even left my stuff behind, just walked away so we could move on. I'm now settled and happier, lovely relationship and haven't spoken to him for two and a half years. Suddenly he has emailed a big long email saying he has thought about me everyday and needs to know i'm ok. I can't help but feel this is just him feeling guilty and needing 'closure' to go on and be the good guy (he was very good at saving face to others when I was treated badly). He mentioned meeting up....

Has anyone been through similar and what would they advise? Don't respond or just a polite response? I do have guilt about things I said for those last days and do hope he's ok, but this has really shocked me.

Just had this myself but I was the one who reached out. So disappointed in myself. It was like weird deja vu going back to his etc. It was nice for awhile. Just hanging out now and again, but then the love bombing started and I was triggered to fuck. I came across screenshot of messages I had saved and immediately I was like wtf am I doing.

Just block, do not give any head space.

Yes and circumstances were similar. I didn’t feel comfortable just ignoring him, almost like it was left unfinished so I decided to minimise the whole thing and make him feel a bit silly.

I said something like… it was water under the bridge and there’s no need to bring it up again. I had moved on & I hope he will now too.

It kind of sounds like I was like your ex there, really wasn't haha. Well actually maybe I was being like him. But whatever, far too vulnerable to be getting entangled with manipulators again. When you get into these toxic relationships I think the habits and patterns rub off. I'm not happy single, but at least I'm not mental.

Go read lalaletmeexplain on Instagram. He’s a fuck boy, fucking with your head.

I had something similar. I replied we had a chat through message. I thought maybe it would give us both closure. But I think it was more about him. It didn’t give me closure. It dragged it all up from the past tbh. I appreciated it at first. But think maybe it was best left where it was.

Penny to a pound, he's just been binned off ...?