One little comment.

[NaoiseNOTnoise]

Wall of text incoming.

I dont have many friends, its me and 2 lads i grew up with. I dont consider anyone else my friend. Apart from a girl i worked with and keep in regular contact with. Everyone else is just someone i know or work with.

I've always been comfortable in the company of women, from high school my class was 4 males and 21 females. Then I became a nurse and it's pretty much 10:1 females to males.

I don't have any male friends outside i guys I mentioned. I've tried but it just fizzles out.

A new nurse came to my ward (6 months ago), she banked there before she finished her training, when i was telling her id like to leave to persue new oppertunities cos id been there so long she said if i was leaving she wouldnt have asked to come to my ward. That was fine, all the wards were shit with very little staff and id taken her under my wing and supported her so i was a bit touched really.

She said to me id have you killed if you were my husband because you are so friendly with all these female nurses. I said, no, I just enjoy the banter and she told me that she was told I'm a bit of a tease! I told her I only have one female friend and she said boys and girls can't be friends because guys are just waiting for an opening to sleep with you.

Now I've always been pretty naive when it comes to women's feelings, I didn't know my wife liked me until she was kissing me but it had apparently been pretty obvious.

But it got me thinking about one particular female nurse I do consider a friend. We have ths same interests, same sense of humour, same age, same life experiences. So I've been able to talk to her and she has unloaded so pretty bigs events in her life to me, while I have not been so open in return as it doesn't feel comfortable.

But I now feel pretty uncomfortable with it all and it's making me act weird at work and people have been asking what's up. I've sort of been low key ignoring my female friend too. It makes me cringe that people see me this way and I'm not sure what to do about it. Maybe it actually is time to leave for new pastures?

I don't agree that men and women can't be friends. I am still in contact with a ex colleague at a place I worked in 12 years ago . I moved away and we still phone for a chat and send Christmas cards . We are both married and my dh is often at home when the phone rings and we spend an hour catching up.

Why do you care so much about one person’s comments? you’re faithful to your wife and you’re not having an affair- is your relationship good? Does your wife have any issues with you having female friends? Focus on who you are and not what one woman said about you

I have many male friends, DH has some female friends. I will often have lunch, drinks or dinner with any of my friends, as does he. It's no big deal. Friends are friends.

I've more male friends than female due to my hobbies

Of course males and females can be friends. Not every man wants to bang every women. And pretty much every woman knows this. So ignore this person, and keep being you and being friends with your lovely friends.

This nurse sounds deranged.
Please don't let her affect your behaviour or how you feel about people!
She is not representative of women. I have met people who hold views like that, male and female, give them a very wide berth as that kind of perspective comes from a really unhealthy view of the range of relationships possible in this life.
Most people I know have friendships of both sexes and that's normal.

My longest standing friendship is a male, I'm a female. We were young and single when we met and have never even nearly kissed. We're both happily married to our own spouses he's got 2 kids, I have also. Not a flicker of romantic interest from either of us. This woman is talking bollox

It's hard when someone tells you something and you don't perceive it the same way. You do question yourself.

You're a faithful man who works in a (highly stressful) female dominated environment, it would be untenable to not have friends.

In your message you make it clear you don't reciprocate the depth of conversation with your friend because it crosses a boundary for you! That's great. You realise your boundaries and are protecting your marriage.

I think it's entirely possible for men and women to be friends as long as firm boundaries are in place and these friendships don't take time away from the primary relationship.

Guys thanks for taking the time to respond.

Rightly or wrongly I do care what people think of me, I am keen to please people and I always like that I was able to help or support someone.

It's just in my head now that I may not be perceived by others the way I think of myself.

If this is the first time this has happened to you, i wouldn't worry that youre percieved in a particular way. I think the woman who said this was testing the water. She is likely attracted to you and mistook your friendship for reciprocation. When she saw you being equally friendly to other women she was probably a bit surprised as she thought it was 'special' to her and meant something.
Women have this sort of thing happen to them all the time when they're friendly around men. It's not our fault or anything we're doing wrong, and that's true for you too.

You know who you are op. Stay true to that and it will shine out for all to see. This garbage that she dumped on you is toxic nonsense.
Imagine a world where friendships across sexes was impossible/non existent/disallowed... It's not the world I live in, and not one I would want to.
Friendship and platonic support is entirely boundless in this life because most people are not purely driven by sexual urges derived from normal social contact!
It's lovely you value others opinions, it's probably what makes you caring and a good nurse. But don't swallow this BS, because your behaviour and surety of spirit should not be tilted on it's axis by one person who views life through such a basic and limited prism.
Lift your head high, and continue to be a positive presence in the lives of your colleagues male and female. This other woman who has caused such doubt can eat her words.