Leaving

[tiredandwantadvice]

Hi, mum of 4 month old here, New to mumsnet so not sure of all the terms etc

Quick run down; had no support during pregnancy, having to pack and move all of our things whilst heavily pregnant, huge fears over money as other half put none away..
Extremely traumatic birth, emergency c section, horrific induction, other half was on phone for all of labour, no support during contractions
No support during nights, not one night yet! Couldn't breast feed due to blood loss during birth, could barely walk due to c section, no support with house work/baby, arguing with me in the night saying I had changed since the birth (well yes I'm exhausted and probably depressed)
Horrific arguments, calling me awful names, falling out with my parents...the list goes on

I want to leave as I don't want this to be my life, can anyone give me advice on how to be a sahm whilst still on maternity / get housing with no income / what steps I can take?
This would be so appreciated as I am floundering

Thank you

cant help with advice, sorry, just sending you lots of strength and love xx

I'm sorry things are difficult.

Who owns/rents your home? Why should you be the one to leave? Do you have an income? Work? Where could you go?

How old are you? Do you have any help nearby, family? Does your dp know how to help?

Could you get his mum in to restore a bit of order, give you some support and show him what to do. I know that might sound silly but some men simply don't have a clue what is expected of them. If he isn't great with the baby, can he do the shopping & washing etc.

It sounds like you have two babies who need to learn routines.

You will be able to get help through benefits. There is a good calculator called ‘entitled to’ which will give you a good idea. Do you have family you could stay with temporarily? The local authority can probably provide you with some advice. Do you rent or own the home you’re currently in?

We rent from one of my partners friends, the rent and bills would be too much for me alone, even if i went back to work full time

I'm 32, currently on basic maternity, have a job to return to, but no available childcare/no family in this area

I could stay with parents who are 6 hours away but would be very difficult

He says he doesn't know how to help, but he has seen me do it all/ ask for help for months. His mum passed when he was little, a lot of the problems are blamed on this. My mum tried to talk to him after witnessing what he was like and at the time he was responsive, but afterwards said she was condescending...
He is never at fault with anything....

Thanks for responding