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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

To not know what to do?

0 replies

Tippletoomany · 29/12/2022 09:51

Hi,

Apologies for a slightly long one but I am so unsure what to do at the moment and am looking for some help.

I am currently in a relationship with DP that has been going on for around 3 years. He’s really lovely and kind but there’s just something about the relationship that doesn’t seem to have felt right for a while.

I have found in all my previous relationships that at the start of the relationship I am really excited and we have a lot of sex but then after about a year and a half, I no longer want sex and the thought of them touching me revolts me. All I can think about is how much more attractive other people are, I guess it’s a case of grass is greener.

We have spoken about this a lot and discussed the fact that I have had doubts about the relationship, have not been wanting sex, etc… but everytime we talk he makes me just feel like it’s the normality of a relationship and that these things happen with longer term relationships. In my head, I see people who have been together for far longer and they are a lot more affectionate and still have sex so it makes me feel that it isn’t normal.

As I said, he is lovely but I just feel like there’s a spark missing. I am sometimes excited to see him and other times I’m really not. It’s also been a hard year as his dad has died so I’m not sure if that has made this worse although these problems were there before that.

I think this probably isn’t normal but also confused why the exact thing happens in all my relationships and if I just have to accept it.

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