AIBU to not lend my partner my car?

[SuzieSheep22]

He owns his own business & has booked himself on a course in Scotland, 250 miles from where we live. He has a van for his work & we share a car (I put majority money towards finance £300/£130).

He keeps dropping hints as to how he’s worried his van won’t get him there. I asked why he hadn’t thought about logistics when he booked & he said he thought I’d let him use the car for the 3 day trip, leaving me with his transit van to do the school run & get me to work etc.

I’m really don’t want to be driving that big cumbersome van around everywhere! AIBU?

Tell him to hire a car. It's tax deductible.

What @newtb said.

in your title you say partner but in the post you’re not treating him like a partner?
yes it’s inconvenient but it’s only 3 days…

Yeah I wouldn't be lending him the car that is mostly paid for by you, to use a work van for school runs.

Also surely he needs to make sure his van IS reliable if he's using it for work. He can hire a car as a previous poster suggested.

My OH used to have silly little fast car, and I had (still have) a 4x4. When he changed jobs (subcontracted painter/decorator) he suddenly kept asking to use my car since it had space for all his equipment. Firm no from me, even though I don't need my 4x4 every day, I just didn't like driving his silly little fast car.

Guess how long it took for him to sell the silly car and get a sensible one 😅

He can east drive your car but your not happy to drive his van. That s reasonable given a vans relative size/blindspots etc. Hiring a car/taking a train is the best option for both. It's just hassle for.him which is likely the problem....

You share a car, why do you consider it to be your car?

Considering this is a man you live with I think YABU. I was expecting this to be about a man you have been dating 2 months, not someone you live (and potentially even have kids) with. Yes it's a bit inconvenient for you but if you are not willing to help out a partner why are you together? I could not imaging telling my partner he can't use my car, just like he would never dream of telling me I couldn't use his

Doesn't he pay £130 towards the finance? I think that gives him a reasonable entitlement to use the car.

If I begrudged my partner something which would make a long trip easier and more comfortable, then I wouldn’t bother having a partner. If this is how you feel about your relationship, just be single and share nothing with anybody, it’s easier. That’s even without considering that he pays towards it and should be able to have use of it when needed.

£430 is an absurd amount to spend each month on a car you don't both get decent use out of.

YABU and for all of you sating hire a car have you checked the prices to hire recently?
Its 3 days, just drive the transit, they're not big or cumbersome really, sorry but if you share a car, you share it.
Me and DH have a car and a truck between us, we both use them equally as they are OURS.

Agree. I can’t even get over the thread title, to refer to somebody as partner and then not want to let them use a car, one that they assist in paying for too.

If he pays £130 a month for the car, then yeah, this is his turn.

YABU.

It's three days if leg him

Just wow! He's your partner, surely you share everything? Truly lost for words at your selfishness. It is 3 days.

Just wow! He's your partner, surely you share everything? Truly lost for words at your selfishness. It is 3 days

Nonsense. She can’t do the school run in his works van.

Van’s for work. Car’s for normal life.

How many dc? Is there enough seat belts for them while you are doing the school run?

How do you know OP can't do the school run in a van? Plenty of children are delivered to school by working parents in a van. DC could walk if old enough, close enough to the school or get the bus. OP's partner has a point. Why risk driving an older vehicle so far?