This year my 20yr relationship ended. TBH it was a long time coming and I am now the happiest I've been in a long time. I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I'm not stressed out and pissed off everyday. I'm not arguing with someone everyday. I've been with my ex my entire adult life and it took alot of courage to end the relationship. We had become toxic together and it was best for all of us (me, ex, kids) to end it.
Now I'm looking to the future with equal amounts of fear and excitement.
This time last year my future was mapped out with my ex. But now I have no idea what lies ahead. That's exciting, a whole new chapter lies ahead.
But it's also really scary. Ex has had nothing to do with the children since he left (his choice). This means I have zero time to myself. I'm either in work or with the children. How on earth am I supposed to meet someone else? Not that I want that right now. In fact if a man came onto me today, id run a mile but im only 40. Id hate to think im going to be alone forever.
I don't have a "village" to help with the children so even nights out with friends are going to be rare.
I've decided to spent 2023 focusing on me. Drinking less, eating healthy, getting my mind and body back into shape. I'm trying to stay positive but that nagging thought that I'm going to be alone forever is always lingering in the back of my mind.
Anyone else?