Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

TW- sexual abuse, domestic violence.

9 replies

Nendndoxk · 22/12/2022 23:24

Been with my stbxdp for over a decade.
We have kids. (Primary age)
Hes abusive mainly psychologically and sexually but also financially and emotionally.
Ive always painted a rosy picture of our life. Lied to myself and denied it was that bad.
He’s done many good things for our family.
Were not married. His mortgage.

He’s mainly sexually coercive, I’ve given in many times through exhaustion. He’s raped me on a few occasions. Either by way of me saying stop and him not or him having sex with me although I’m definitely telling him it’s not what I want. Never violent.

Things have got bad.

I want to know what I would need to have a decent chance of him being convicted if I went to the police. What evidence I would have to prove that he’s an abuser.
there is no way I’m going to report this unless I feel like I have a chance.
The reason being that if the case is dropped it’s an instant win for him.

I have multiple text messages of me begging him to stop being abusive and maybe some voice notes of him being verbally abusive.

OP posts:
Nendndoxk · 23/12/2022 09:55

Bump

OP posts:
Crestaq · 23/12/2022 10:07

I think ralk to a solicitor or the police.

Crestaq · 23/12/2022 10:08

Talk

CarrotCake84 · 23/12/2022 10:20

If you call Women’s Aid, they will guide you through the process. Sorry you’ve been through such an awful time.
All the best!

B1rd · 23/12/2022 20:56

I think your question is best placed in the relationship forum. People over there would be best placed to help you.

B1rd · 23/12/2022 20:58

I've asked for it to be sent over. Take care.

Nendndoxk · 23/12/2022 21:44

Has this been moved now? I can’t tell. Sorry for posting in wrong place.

OP posts:
B1rd · 23/12/2022 22:48

No, I've done a second request.

KimMumsnet · 24/12/2022 09:10

Hi, OP.
We hope you don't mind, but we've moved your thread over to our Relationships board now, as we think you might find some more support there. And you might like to check out some of the organisations linked on our page here.
Take care,
Kim

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread