Is my friend in love with me?

[FriendZoneFifi]

NC for this.

I have a close male friend. Both married with DC. He’s a very good friend, or at least I thought we had a really lovely platonic friendship.

We have kind of existed in a bubble and socialize without our partners for the most part through our mutual hobby. He has met DH a handful of times, always in a big group setting so I have never noticed their interactions before. However on Sunday DH and I bumped into friend and his DW by chance and I was struck by how “off” my friend was with DH. DH is lovely, everybody loves him, and my friend is the same so I was a bit surprised. I mentioned it when we got home and DH said friend has always been like that with him and it was very obvious he was in love with me and wanted me for himself. DH was good natured about it and is not at all jealous/possessive.

It’s been playing on my mind and I feel really weird about my friend now. Could DH be right? I’m now wondering whether all along he was just friends with me in the hope there’d be something more one day? I actually feel quite sad about it all. Am I overreacting? Not sure what to do, I don’t want to lose the friendship or the hobby but it feels different now :(

I wouldn't worry about it. Even if he's right then it's just one of them things. Carry on with your hobby.

He’s probably got a little crush. No evidence he’s in love with you. Your DH sounds very level. How was the bloke with his wife present?

He’s different when his wife is around, much more subdued. He’s quite cheerful and bouncy usually. I have wondered recently if he’s not that happy anymore, he isn’t negative about her per se but he mentions arguments they’ve and has said they rarely have sex.

He talks to you about his sex life with his wife! 🤔 Does your DH know you have these intimate conversations with this 'friend'?

That friend is planting seeds, me thinks.

There’s nothing here that would indicate that he likes you that way, nevermind would be in live with you.

I’d take your husband’s comment with a massive grain of salt.
Some people are so egomaniac that they think other’s want their partner.
Gives them some kind of power feeling or makes them horny.
You clearly got an ego boost from your husbands comment.
Give you head a little wobble and continue life.

Oh give over OP with the wide eyed innocent act. You're having cosey chats with a man who is telling you he argues with his wife and doesn't have sex much, who you wonder isn't happy. You're playing with fire as well you know..

When you and your friend practise your mutual hobby, why do you talk about his sex life?

How ridiculous

OP
I’d have trouble being close friends with someone who was rude to my spouse

Why has this thread been resurrected?

just realised date

Be careful OP. Don’t believe everything your male married friend tells you. A partner of my DH’s friend was told by my DH that we very rarely have sex and that is a lot of nonsense. We have very frequent sex. He knows she has a massive crush on him and plays her along for fun.
……And that has made me lose respect for him in a big way.
a) because he told her a lie and
b) because he thinks it’s ok to treat women in this way.

You need to end this friendship.
Your hobby friend needs to have a long hard look at himself. His poor poor wife who is completely unaware he's discussing their sex life.
Your own husband is observant and I think his assessment is fair.
Leave the hobby and find a new group for it elsewhere.

Yes, that's a more interesting question, currently.