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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Am I wrong for wanting to leave

14 replies

Booboo3629 · 13/12/2022 11:53

Hi all , iv been with my partner a while now , at first it was amazing , we have children to different partners and one child between us , anyway my partner never takes me out anymore and we don't go away etc but he will go on nights out with mates all the time where as im left with the baby , he really got me mad the other weekend as he never mentioned going clubbing he left home in casual clothes for me to then find out he'd hidden his going out clothes and had gone clubbing , iv no problem with him going out but it is nearly every weekend, and he doesmt get home till 3/4 in the morning , I pulled him up about it an all I got was ' I do what I want when I want no one tells me what to do my own parents couldnt' followed by telling me to get a grip or to f off , hes now gone and got a passport so obviously is planning on going away ! He also hangs round with a 20year old hes 33 by the way iv told him iv had enough but again I just get told ' am I for f*ng real'

OP posts:
Hopeyoursproutsarealreadyon · 13/12/2022 11:54

Leave op. Seriously.. But I would plan on raising your dc alone. I doubt he will bother..

Catapultaway · 13/12/2022 11:59

Having separate social life's can become normal when you have children. Certainly is for us as we have very limited childcare options.
But in a healthy relationship it cuts both ways. He can have nights out (completely normal) but so can you.
The issue here is the way he talks to you and treats you... That is the opposite of normal and healthy. Walk away now.

Ofcourseshecan · 13/12/2022 11:59

He sounds vile. I’m afraid he’s your partner in name only, OP. You and DC will be better off without him.

Original poster
Booboo3629 · 13/12/2022 12:09

@Catapultaway I hardly go out as iv always got the baby the only time I get to go out is if my parents have him

OP posts:
Sandra1984 · 13/12/2022 12:10

He sounds like someone with the emotional maturity of a worm. This man was not ready to partner and breed, sounds like a man child.

Delandra · 13/12/2022 12:20

Why do some men turn into rebellious teenagers when they become a father? It sounds miserable for you, OP. Can you have any conversations about this without him blowing back?

Original poster
Booboo3629 · 13/12/2022 12:35

@Delandra no hence why I'm wanting to leave he is just selfish and rude as long as he's happy and doing what he wants he doesn't give a toss about anyone else

OP posts:
Original poster
Booboo3629 · 13/12/2022 13:01

I might also add he spends more time with this 20year old lad then he does his family he goes out for meals with him etc and if anyone says anything he blows up bit weird if you ask me

OP posts:
Bedazzled22 · 13/12/2022 13:08

In answer to the question, you are not wrong in wanting to leave this overgrown teenager.

Herejustforthisone · 13/12/2022 13:36

I’m beginning to have a visceral reaction to all these threads about awful, abusive, failing men. I need to get off this site.

Original poster
Booboo3629 · 13/12/2022 13:38

Well enough is enough unfortunately I'm the only one making sacrafices for our child while he goes off living the life of Riley and if he wants to do what he wants when he want and go on holidays nights out all the time then he can go enjoy being on his a** and single because once he's out my home he's got nothing , and yes I might sound awful but iv actually had enough now and I can cope oerfectly fine on my own

OP posts:
BonnyBoo · 20/12/2022 20:38

Booboo3629 · 13/12/2022 11:53

Hi all , iv been with my partner a while now , at first it was amazing , we have children to different partners and one child between us , anyway my partner never takes me out anymore and we don't go away etc but he will go on nights out with mates all the time where as im left with the baby , he really got me mad the other weekend as he never mentioned going clubbing he left home in casual clothes for me to then find out he'd hidden his going out clothes and had gone clubbing , iv no problem with him going out but it is nearly every weekend, and he doesmt get home till 3/4 in the morning , I pulled him up about it an all I got was ' I do what I want when I want no one tells me what to do my own parents couldnt' followed by telling me to get a grip or to f off , hes now gone and got a passport so obviously is planning on going away ! He also hangs round with a 20year old hes 33 by the way iv told him iv had enough but again I just get told ' am I for f*ng real'

Hi I’m in a similar situation love

EthicalNonMahogany · 20/12/2022 20:41

Once he's out of your home he has nothing? So it's not his house,he's not contributing? I'm sorry you had a baby with him. Kick him out, go it alone, he's a classic waste of space. You don't sound awful you've been hoodwinked.

KirstenBlest · 20/12/2022 20:47

Kick him out

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