Found out partner has downloaded tinder

[lplp1]

Please tell me what you would do.

Partner got drunk last night and argumentative- as usual.
I told him I wasn't carrying on wrapping presents with him because of how he was acting and that I wasn't listening to him anymore and I'd speak to him in the morning. This is normal for me to do this, once I can see what mood he is in, I will not engage in any conversation as he will just escalate it.

So, turns out, whilst I was tidying and getting ready for bed he has downloaded Tinder.

He doesn't know I know.

Been together 4 and a half years and have one DC together.

Has he gone any further than downloading it ? if not I’d just monitor.

Of course the Tinder download is an issue, as he clearly had something in mind when he did it. Even if it was a petulant f*ck you sort of thing.

However, the getting drunk and argumentative seems to be a regular occurrence from what you indicate? What's the deal there?

Just set up an account, put his photo, different name and put himself as considerably younger lol.

When he drinks, he goes over the top, and more often than not he gets incredibly argumentative, doesn't listen and just talks over me. So I walk away and refuse to answer him to stop it escalating.

Childish response to a childish problem. I'd leave. Sounds like you're on different pages. If he turns into a dock when drinking, he needs to stop drinking or not be a dock.

I mean dick you obviously

Urgh. No need for the random you there.

I would break up with him; it doesn’t sound like you get on anyway so time to end it

You realise this is a huge problem? This won't ever change. I can tell you this from experience

He can't handle his alcohol. This isn't normal. The tinder is a separate issue. Not all men are like this, you should consider your options as your child will grow up seeing this and thinking its normal and ok

If you want to stay with him, you need to ask him to address his problem with alcohol.

I don't think you should be accepting that he gets drunk & nasty on the regular and you just remove yourself until the morning. It's no way to live or have a happy relationship.

His drinking is a problem. He needs to stop.

Tinder is the least of your problems

Tinder isnt good but its the drinking/arguments that is the real issue here.

So, turns out, whilst I was tidying and getting ready for bed he has downloaded Tinder.

He doesn't know I know.

How do you know then?

When he went to bed his phone kept going off and the notifications kept popping up.

So my friend checked her tinder and he was there.

It's just so frustrating because we get on so well when he doesn't drink.

Admittedly I do the lion's share in the house with regards to childcare, housework and just everything in general, he does help with stuff if I ask. I can put up with that and I don't really mind it, but I'm just so tired of this. And the tinder thing really is the last straw now.

This is pretty much how he is every time he drinks. Even when I sit in silence he will carry on going on and on at me. At times he's even followed me round the house to keep on at me.

I asked him so many times this week to not get so drunk at the weekend and even last night I asked him to please slow down because I was so excited for our night in together.

It's me or alcohol.

Sounds like Tinder is the least of your worries tbh. This was all you needed to post really:

Partner got drunk last night and argumentative- as usual.

And he doesn't do his fair share at home either?! You'd be better off without this man.

You need to leave him. That's how this is going to end anyway, so you can either do it now or waste a few more years, but unless he stays sober: it's over.