This is my first time posting here and I hope some kind soul somewhere will be able to help me.
13 years ago I met my wife and things were rocky from the start. She had a lot of issues from her past that she brought into our relationship and treated me very poorly for no reason, all of this started to hurt me a lot in what she said because I had done nothing at that point to deserve anything bad thrown at me.
With that start and other things she did it kept building and I turned into this person who was angry, I would say mean things to her and sometimes our children if I was angry and they did not deserve it. I didn't know how to get better, I didn't know what I needed to get better. I started taking anti depressants, saw psychologists but none of it worked because I didn't know what I needed. Things ping ponged over the years with both of us having down times, mainly me as my depression spiralled until I lost sight of what was around me, my 3 beautiful children and beautiful wife.
On Friday past she told me she didn't love me anymore and wanted the marriage to be over, this is what destroyed that prison I was living in and since then I have been changing how I am, little but important things to start and the first change I made was with my children, I explained to them everything and apologised and promised that the person I was before is dead and gone, never to return. I see now that they and my wide are what brings light to my life and that it was me that needed to work through everything, forgive what had happened and stop blaming my wife for what she did, only I can control how I feel.
She says she feels trapped and I won't let her go, she feels she is not being listened to because she is not happy, I asked for a last chance and i have until July of next year to see if I can earn her love back, if I can win back her love of my company, i know what I need to do and that is be who I was before all of this, be happy and positive, be present, I hope it is enough.