But if an old thread but if it’s not too late i will chuck my hat in the ring.
Went through many relationships earlier in life, i was decent looking, able to splash the cash and always had a pretty girl by my side. My last relationship, one of 7 years, ended when i was early forties, with a lovely girl, but a relationship that had flaws and neither of us felt we wanted kids. I was sad when it ended but it was more my decision than hers.
Moved on, met a single mum (never dated one of those before) with two girls, 6 and 11, and a jealous ex who had moved on, but decided he was going to be awfull, and was for years.
The change of pretty girl to ready made family was a big one. Major attitude changes required by me, was fairly touch and go initially, and me never really wanting kids, was kind of a good and bad thing. I got along with the kods, and in time, i started to miss not having my own and it played on my mind.
In the end, we had over a period of 6 months a long discussion, where she wanted to give me kids (i think she saw me as a great dad and didn’t want me to regret not having my own) and i knew that that was a big ask of her, a restarting of the child clock, and retirement being delayed for us, not to mention all the other complications.
In the end, i had to say no. I decided to think of her two kids as my own (i’d always treated them as such) but this just formalised it i guess.
I didn’t set out not to have kids, truth be told i’d never enjoyed being around them, until i met a couple i loved, and i decided i was going to invest myself into as step dad. I do regret that i don’t have my own, but as my youngest step daughter is now 17, will be heading off to Uni next year giving her mum and i to do our own world travelling, a child would have delayed that a decade. If it ever comes up in conversation, i always say to my youngest, if i could have had my own kid, id have picked one just like her.