Advice for people with parents who struggle showing emotions/affection/interest

[HeartIsWhereTheHomeIs]

I thought I might see if others are in the same boat. I know mine love me really but they rarely ask about me or the dc or are really involved in our lives. Ditto with my DSis and our family. We’re starting to be a bit more involved in helping with stuff as they get older and more frail so it feels like a time for reflection. I’d be interested to know how others feel about this if it’s in their family too. Are you still in touch? Do you just accept how they are and get on?

My DM is dead now (talking about DM because DF died when we were kids) - we just got on with the fact that she was pretty much emotionally absent. I don't know what my brothers' memories are but I don't recall hugs or being asked how school went - when I read about things like parents checking their kids' revision and stressing over them and their lives I feel very envious because there was none of that in our house. There was zero support when my marriage broke down and I don't think DM ever knew (or asked) what it was I did for a living. We didn't lack for stuff - we were warm, fed, housed, had presents at b'days and Xmas, but in retrospect there was a lot missing. Not at the time, it was how she was and we dealt with that.

She wasn't a particularly warm woman anyway but I've often wondered if after DF died she completely sealed herself off emotionally, even from her children, so as not to have to feel that pain again.