Cherchez la femme or something different?

[ClarityClara]

Does this sound like a case of cherchez la femme, to you, or something different?

Married 25 years, no history of cheating. Not much in the way of arguments or disagreements, always got on very well. No signs of cheating whatsoever. Then out of the blue, during a minor disagreement, DH says he's 'done' and wants a divorce. He's an older man and I have never heard him use the expression 'done' in that context or any similar context. I would never have expected him to ever say he wanted a divorce. Shocking in itself, but the choice of terminology also shocked me. It sounded so completely unlike him.

He also tells me to 'fuck off' but then follows that up with 'all of you, just fuck off'. There was only me and him in the room at the time. We only have one grown-up DC living with us so saying 'all' of you didn't make sense. Surely he'd say 'both'?

When you say older man how old is he exactly? Im wondering if there isn’t some medical issue going on ….. the part where you say “all of you” is odd isn’t it? Any other confusion or forgetfulness occurring ?

That does sound odd. Is he under a lot of stress at the moment, with work or his family?

"All of you can fuck off" sounds like he feels attacked or pressured from all sides, if you know what I mean?

I had not noticed any forgetfulness before this event. But the day after the event his behaviour became stranger. He became quick in movement, he seemed distracted, he forgot something I had told him about twenty minutes earlier, he said a couple of things about me that were derogatory, yet I was right there, but it was like he was saying these things about me like I wasn't there. He has never said anything derogatory about me (at least, not to me).

I'm sorry to say but I would think about having him investigated for possible early signs of dementia, stroke or other neurological conditions.