Non-mol to keep Nex away

[rmummyofone]

I was wondering if anyone has had one put in place and how the process was?

I want to encourage contact between our son and my ex but I don't want this to be a way he can further harass and intimidate me.

Long story short my ex used religion to coercively control me over 3 years, cover my face everywhere I went and also jobs / finances and sex. My ex threatened to show my dad and uncle intimate videos of me if I spoke up against him.

The last contact we had was through my counsellors trying to talk things out so I don't talk about why we're divorced to the community. Which if you haven't guessed already, everyone knows everyone in the community we come from.

Nex was a decent dad but a terribly abusive husband. I can't give plenty of examples of this through events and texts etc. I can also show videos of him shouting at me threatening to call police on me all bevause I was trying to calm him down and him screaming at me that if I married someone else they'd have divorced me a long time ago. I have a witness to the threats of releasing videos. I am terrified of him doing this.

I have been in touch with the police but it's my IVDA who recommended a non mol.

If it's coercive control, emotional abuse and threats of revenge porn? Is this enough to be granted a non mol.

He is v clever and will deny everything even if the evidence is right there. I'm worried child contact will be an excuse for him to bully me if I don't do things his way.

I will be blunt. Why do you want your dc around such a man? Dna isn't reason to expose your dc to this without a judge absolutely forcing it.

Women in poor relationships often write the good dad comment when they themselves have nothing positive to write about their man.

Your son needs to stay away from his father at all costs. Why on earth do you want to encourage a relationship between them at all, ask yourself that question honestly. If this man is abusive and or otherwise toxic and or batshit for you to deal with, its the SAME deal for your son too, your most precious resource.

@Sprouttreesareamazing because the court system will ALWAYS push for contact, my heart breaks for our son. Abusers continue their abuse through child contaft which is why this non mol is so needed :(

@AttilaTheMeerkat I know what you're saying. I wish it was all in my control but cafcass don't care about abuse. They care about what's best for the child and it's plastered all over everything they say, child has a right to have a relationship with both parents.

I'm scared for whats to come. I really need this non mol. Contact will also be supervised when it comes to our son.