ExH has cancelled mortgage direct debit

[WhatsTheStoryThisTime]

Going through a divorce and still have a joint bills bank account with ExH until we are sorted. The bank account is literally just joint mortgages / life insurances / home insurances.
I have had an alert on my phone to notify of a cancellation to one of our mortgage payments and rang the bank who confirmed this.
We are no contact due to his controlling and manipulative behaviour. I will ring the mortgage company and solicitor tomorrow but I really can’t afford to cover the mortgage costs if he has no intention of paying anything.
Im sure he knows I’m sat at home on a weekend stressing over this. Any advice?

If he's not living there why should he pay towards the mortgage? On paper he is responsible but I don't see why he should contribute if he's not there but you are?

I've been paying the mortgage on my own since ex moved out

@Mydogatemypurse absolutely awful! How are you 18 months into a financial order? Is it allowed to go on that long?!
I am sick with worry. Big hugs to you, it’s sounds like you have been through the mill and more! X

@Blushingm i pay the mortgage out of the maintenance that he provides for his two children. He still has a financial interest in the property, considering he would like 50% of the equity….

If he pays maintenance I don't see the issue with him cancelling the DD then?

If he expects 50% then you have proof when he stopped contributing so his 50% would be the equity on that date

@Blushingm no issue in him cancelling a direct debit from the joint account for the roof over his kids head?

It can go on for as long as needed to get info required to make the order. Usually 6-8 weeks
He didnt return what he needed to over and over. So it kept ajourned. I pay every time its ajouned as im the applicant. He knows exactly what hes doing
Told me i would run out of money b4 him.

@Mydogatemypurse this doesn’t give me much hope at all - I think this is exactly how it will play out for me. My solicitor sounds hopeful that the order to court will chivvy him along….

Has he agreed to sell the house? If so he’s being unreasonable, but if you’re expecting to keep a house beyond your means then maybe he’s had enough.

*if not

Not really - just phone and set it up from your own account as you are going to pay it anyway.

Why have a joint account anyway if he's paying you maintenance then you're responsible for paying all the bills.....no need for either of you to have a joint account

My ex did this too. My solicitor said he wouldn't be forced to pay a mortgage as well as rent so it was down to me to pay it all. It was hard at the time and I managed to rent a room out to a lodger plus got some extra work to keep my head above water. Is this something you could look at doing? I do sympathise because it was incredibly stressful as well as exhausting but my situation did eventually improve with pay rises and then meeting my new partner.

This is allowed unfortunately. The fact is tho, when there were 2 salaries, like in our case you take on a higher mortgage than you would as a single mum. So yes you are living beyond your means under duress. And you are trapped because they wont agree to sell the property without a financial hearing. The maintenance i recieve, when i do (and yes he can still do this despite it being thru the cms) doesnt cover half my mortgage so they legally push you into poverty and there is no recourse to change things until... guess what.. there is a financial order in place.
He is still entitled to 50% of the house as a STARTING POINT even if he doesnt contribute BUT this is where legal representation is worth it the 50/50 moves to account for some of this. As does the fact that you are housing the children. Its hard my love. Im not going to sugar coat it but you need to approach legal support, DV support and debt charities and have good communication with your creditors... its like a full time job but you have to. At some point it has to be over.

Im so glad you are ok. Xxx