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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Why are people so flaky/thoughtless these days?

3 replies

Artygirlghost · 25/11/2022 13:31

I am having one of these days when people just seem to let me down and it made me wonder why so many whether on a professional or private level can't seem to keep their promises or at least give you a warning that plans have changed. Examples:

  • Today I was due to meet a friend the afternoon. Meeting was arranged last week. I text them to say I was on my way the reply ''I completely forgot, I am on a train to X...''. Lovely.
  • Waiting to hear back from an estate agent about moving into rental property. They promised yesterday they would get in touch in the morning with the final arrangements. Nothing yet. so now I again have to chase them and I have been doing that all week. I am just one step from withdrawing my application (having gone through a lengthy reference check process...) and going with another agent.
  • Yesterday went into my office to meet a colleague who had asked me to help her work on a project . I get there and after some brief updates she decides the project will need to be worked on at a different date. So I commuted all the way for nothing...

Don't people in general realise their behaviour has an impact on other? that other people's time are not just commodity they can use as they wish?

I rarely cancel plans at the last minute and if I say I am going to do something, I do it. I also inform people if for whatever reason something has to be changed/cancelled.

I am seriously pissed off that these people in general seem to think my time and myself in general don't seem to deserve basic courtesy.

Is this just la lack of general manners/education/respect?

OP posts:
Watchthesunrise · 25/11/2022 13:44

It sounds like you're too nice and accommodating and people take you for granted. On the last example, did you say, no, that doesn't work for me, I've come all the way here to work on it with you today. I'm here now, let's crack on?

Laurdo · 25/11/2022 13:49

Yeah, I get frustrated by this too. I've recently cut off a few friends because I felt I was putting more into the friendship than them. They were happy to just to constantly cancel plans, forget about plans etc. without so much as an apology. As someone who rarely lets people down it can sting more when people don't have the same consideration. But yeah, I'm with you in that it seems so common these days.

Mary46 · 25/11/2022 15:24

Op I agree people are so lax now. I stopped chasing people. Same thing plans cancelled. I go to things myself now just less hassle

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