My ex broke up with me, and didnt tell me why, she just told me that she ist happy anymore

[Ender13]

My ex is (23F), I'm (26M). We were dating for 1 year and 4 months, 1 month ago she broke up with me.
I tried to find out why, she just stated that ist happy anymore and is uncertain of what shes feeling she said.
I only regret the 3 mistakes that I’ve done in this time of relationship:

1. First mistake was I didnt introduce her to my friends. Which raised kinda a red flag for her. But there is a thing, that she is very very shy around new people, I knew her very well, and once I did introduce her to 2 of my friends, everyting was fine, but afterwards when I asked her “How did u feel around my friends?” She replied “I didnt felt to well, cause they didn't take me into account that much, I felt marginalized.” From then I tried to control everything around me and her, she has this thinking that she will be judged wrong about new people around her, I tried to protect her. But sadly in the end she thought that I dont want to introduce her to my friends and she was thinking that I keep her only for sex and for my satisfaction. All I wanted was to protect her from bad judgements.

2. Second mistake was; she was very skeptical of me that I would cheat on her, I dont blame her attitude cause she had one relationship before me and didnt went that good, I didnt want to ask that much from her past though. Like I was saying, from her likely “paranoic” behaviour, she took my phone, and went through all my messages of course she didnt find anything, (except for 1 thing that we sorted it out and was my university colleague), she also looked at my tik tok likes and saw that I liked few tik-tok short videos of girls, I tried to explain that I was very sorry and she was developing security issues that she is no good for me, that she looks ugly and with big nose and so on. From that time I took all the blame and felt very sorry about what I did.

3. My 3rd mistake was. when we held arguments between us, I was the only one that ran away from fights. OFC I didnt dodge her for days or weeks, I just wanted to clear my mind and come back within 30 - 40 min to discuss. I did it several times, but the last time I was very sorry and told her that I will change and wanted I prove it with facts. She always tells me when I do this that "I always run from problems."
I begged her that she is making a mistake, and stated that I still love her and wanted to get over this obstacles together, I cried in front of her when she gave me the news. It was a tough day.
She said that she will help me get over the pain and sorrow, but of course I told her she is making it worse. I told her that I dont want to talk to her anymore. And that I dont want to be in friend zone.

We kept seeing eachother. I tried to go to her university once, cause she was dodging me and was rescheduling the dates. I waited outside the uni, to talk to her. But she perceived me that I stalk her to see if she is seeing another guy. I told her that she was dodging me that's why I came up. Now she is scared that I'm stalking her... She said that "Now if u did this, I dont know what you're capable of, and I'm afraid."

Its this relationship salvageable ? I want to know how if it’s doable. (sry for my bad english, not my main language)

I don’t think it is. Just take the lessons from it and move on.

She has broken it off with you, told you she's not happy. You have to accept her decision and back off, op. Following her to uni is strange and overstepping. Leave her to get on with her life and move on.

Whole things a dud OP. Let it go and move on.

Sounds like you have dodged a bullet. Move on!

She isn't happy and wants out. All you have to understand is this:

It takes two people's consent to start a relationship and only one person's consent to end it. She has ended it.

And never ever ever turn up somewhere to creep on your ex. That is literally stalking.

Telling you she isn’t happy is a good enough reason.

Back off. She's told she's not interested and is blatantly dodging you. She's going to have a case to go to police if you keep turning up uninvited. She's right, you are displaying stalking behaviour and it's creepy. Leave her alone

You need to accept and move on. Stop obsessing over what you did or didn't do.

I totally agree

Leave her alone.

The best thing for both of you is to make it a clean break. She doesn't have to keep meeting up to talk, likewise, you don't need to agree to be friends to make her feel better about the break up.

Move on.

Its this relationship salvageable?

Short answer is: No

She doesn't have to stay/be with you for any reason she wants. Same for you; if you wanted to break up with her you can.

You cannot force anyone to be in a relationship. At All.

You say you dont want yo talk to her or be her friend. That's fine, don't contact her anymore

You'll drive yousefl mad trying to work out why. There is rarely a reason that can be put right. She changed her mind. That;s very hurtful in the moment, but over time you will realise that there;s no point in being with someone who is no longer happy. You need to be free to meet someone who really clicks with you.

Please leave her alone

She isn't a car you can fix a faulty exhaust on. She has made a decision so leave her be.

Move on dude. You're heading towards a restraining order.

She gave you a reason, you just don't want to accept it.

If she's not happy, then she's not happy. End of. Leave her alone how, stop dwelling on it and move on

She gave you a reason: she isn’t happy.

That’s it. That’s the reason.

She has every right to make this decision, and to expect it to be respected. You now need to leave her alone.

This! I find it a bit worrying a 26 year old doesn't realise all this tbh.

It sounds like she has some issues from previous relationships that she needs to work on before getting into another.

It also sounds like she is looking for a man to 'fix' this for her which is never going to happen.

The mistakes you detailed, the first is understandable. You tried to find a solution to a problem she should have taken responsibility for. It didn't work but if she didn't tell you waht she needed you to do, then you were left trying to figure it out for yourself.

The second, is a bit crappy but you took responsibility. But, again, you can't control or cure how she feels about herself. Rhat is als0 her responsibility.

The third; taking a short amount of time out during an argument to calm down and clear your mind isn't a mistake. It's pretty healthy. I never argue with my boyfriend because if either of us has something we need to talk about, we take time before bringing it up to clarify our thoughts and feelings so that it's a reasoned and reasonable conversation and not a shouting match. Some people like the 'drama' of a big shouting match. They find it cathartic and so, for them, taking a bit of time out is very frustrating.

But aside from all that, you do have a reason - she wasn't happy anymore. You need to accept that.

Its this relationship salvageable ?

No. And if you make any further moves to persuade her it is she will probably be advised by her mates to call the police.

You made some mistakes that might be honest but could also be seen as stalking her. So you MUST now just stop!

She made some mistakes, it isn't just you. She has her own issues to work through. Leave her to do that. She has told you she doesn't want you in her life.

So stop. Take no as no and move on.

It's not salvageable. There's no reason that she could give you that would make you feel any better about this, sometimes you just don't want to be in a relationship with someone anymore. I do feel for you because it's never nice being broken up with, but you need to stop contacting her/turning up unannounced. Whatever your intentions, that must have felt intimidating for her.