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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Partner not pulling weight

28 replies

gkok · 23/11/2022 11:25

Need some advice on how to get partner to pull his weight. We’re both 22, living with his parents and DS and he’s studying a masters from home atm. However he doesn’t get up til 10/11am and sometimes even has a nap in the afternoon, whilst I’m looking after DS all day until partner takes over from 6pm ish til DS bedtime. I usually cook dinner, do all the laundry, most of washing up, all DS’s feeds and basically feeling like I do everything! How can I get my partner to get motivated, be a responsible parent and do well in his masters this year? After all, I am banking on him getting a good job once he’s finished to provide for me and DS, so we can get our own place! Any advice helpful

OP posts:
KettrickenSmiled · 23/11/2022 14:41

OK, good.

But what does he say when you tackle him about his laziness?

gkok · 23/11/2022 14:46

KettrickenSmiled · 23/11/2022 14:41

OK, good.

But what does he say when you tackle him about his laziness?

He reckons I’m just getting on his case and he deserves some time to play video games and that he does plenty of work

OP posts:
KettrickenSmiled · 23/11/2022 14:52

He reckons I’m just getting on his case and he deserves some time to play video games and that he does plenty of work

Right.
That must be infuriating to live with.

You know he won't change, if you manage to save up enough to go & live together? That he will continue to prioritise gaming over childcare & housework? That he will still feel entitled to sit back & let you do all the chores? That he will still have the 'bare minimum' attitude to work as he does to study?

What do his parents think of his attitude & laziness? Are they concerned about his degree? Waiting for him to finally fly the nest? Or just indulgent?

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