My partner of 2.5 years does not live with me.We both have young kids and like to keep things separate.We wont be blending or living together until our kids have moved out. He is old fashioned as far as parenting is concerned.Strict,expects kids to do exacty as theyre told immediately.There's little room for mistakes.Doesnt understand in a house full of kids that there's often shouting and arguments, expects their bedrooms to be spotless and general seargant major stuff.His own eldest two kids have little to do with him and his younger child sees his eow but child would rather be with his friends. These are not my issues as they dont affect my kids normally. I have two kids with additional needs, one with severe anxiety and the other with ASD.I am under a lot of pressure and very busy as Ialso work full time and have another child in late teens with her own issues. My kids Dad essentially abandoned them when he left for affair partner four years ago.They are all badly affected in their own ways. My partner was at my home last weekend and when one of my kids was leaving, they asked me to come to the door to wave goodbye.My partner was kind of laughing.I didn't understand why at the time but later he told me it was because of the way my child has me wrapped around his finger.This is the child with severe anxiety.My partner knows this and due to his anxiety, my child engages regularly in controlling and manipulative type bahaviours.I understand why my child does this and know it's because he is petrified of being abandoned or anything happening me .I have told my partner all of this.I struggle wth these behaviours of course and try to put in boundaries but have little support. My partner then started to comment on one of my other kids shouting for me.This child is a teen, again with ASD.Ihad no intention of responding to the shouting but my partner jumped in and said..'you're not going to feed into that, are you/'.I wasn't going to respond but wondered why he felt it was any of his business.He had asked to stay on an extra night and I agreed but felt the need to pass remarks on any interaction I had with my kids. I finally lost my shit when he came barging into our lounge while we were watching a film asking where a personal belonging was and who had taken it from our room.He used bad language and was stony faced and clearly very angry.This was a charger btw. The truth was that noone had taken it but he had left it exactly where I found it minutes later. I spoke with him the next morning about it as I was annoyed.He hadn't apologized to any of us for his tantrum and acted like it never happened. He is now angry with me and has committed to bringing me to hospital this week but on his terms only.I'm over a barrell as I've no other help.He was going to stay before and after procedure but is now going to collect and drop me.I expect he will dump me now as he is angry and wont speak to me since Sunday due to the way I spoke to him.Can I have your thoughts and some strength please. What can I do...Have I also been unreasonable. Thanks