DO being very off with me- please read.

[soisaids]

NC'd

DP has been living with me and my two DC for a while now. They are not his DC. Myself and DC1 were both unwell today, think it's a viral thing, vomiting and very sore heads. DC2 was mostly fine but kept them off school as a precaution. I was up most of the night with DC1 and when DP got up at 8am, he said go to bed for a proper rest. I got back up at 11:30 and still felt terrible. Myself and DC1 had a sofa day and napped intermittently. DP gave me paracetamol etc but that was it as far as care- he was great with DC1. He also did most of the childcare for DC2. He also made dinner. However, he's been off with me this evening since the DC have gone to bed, won't really speak to me or sit next to me, not hugging me back when I hugged him, seems to be in a mood with me. I appreciate it was a rubbish day for him but he's usually so caring etc. do you think he's just burnt out from today or is annoyed at me or something? He treats DC like his own and is very fond of them and usually goes above and beyond for them so it feels strange he'd be feeling 'put out' over this but maybe it is that?

Could you ask him?
maybe he is trying not to catch it?

well, you are probably infectious, why would he want to be anywhere near you?

I wouldn’t be wanting someone with the spews anywhere near me.

He’s probably just knackered.

if you have some kind of infection thing he is probably trying to avoid catching it

Don’t hug someone when you’ve got a vomiting bug. Have you said thank you for all the childcare? He’s probably just done for the day: talked out, cared out, tired out. Go to bed and sleep off the bug.

He’s avoiding getting unwell. Stop being weird.

Maybe he's coming down with it now too

You’re massively overthinking this. He could just be knackered, trying to avoid catching it or maybe he’s even starting to feel a bit ropey himself.

Drop it and see how he is tomorrow.

You're intuition is probably picking up on something. Perhaps he's reassessing... Perhaps he's thinking ''wow, this is a lot to contend with if soisaids gets sick..

So I would trust your intuition that he might be ''off'' right now, but the situation is off. Try and have faith that you'll deal with whatever comes. Things will either settle down and get back to normal when you're well and healthy. Or maybe you will be the one reassessing soon.

I would imagine he is tired out and not wanting to risk catching anything himself, or possibly even feeling a bit under the weather.

Go to bed and be sure to let him know you've appreciated him stepping up (and yes, I know that's to be expected, but it's still nice to be nice).

Hope tomorrow is better for you all. x

I agree with this. Your intuition is telling you something. I'd put my bet on him being passive aggressive to punish you for being ill. Don't fall into the trap of apologising to him or attempting to 'bring him round' by being ultra nice to him. If he can't step up without a huff when you're ill then leave him.

What a weird post. Leave him alone.

Yeah he might not want to catch the bug but there's no reason for him to be in a mood with OP and not speak to her FFS.

Raise your bar people, this is not normal behaviour

This

I'd wonder if he feels unappreciated. Maybe he's pulled out all the stops but feels you haven't directly thanked him and told him how fantastic and supportive he is. My DH is incredible with my dc and always has been but its easy to take him for granted because he's so modest. He goes quiet at times and I realise it's passive aggression looking for me to acknowledge his efforts a little.

Doesn't want your germs, are you usually this needy?

One thing is keeping a distance good-naturedly. Another thing is giving semi silent treatment.

My abusive ex was like this. Would be all kind in moments like this then would flip out either ranting and raving or complete silent treatment. All for something that wasn't my fault.

Sometimes he'd be off straight away sometimes not. I never knew where I was with him.