Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Lonely but sabotage myself?

4 replies

NameChangeyMcChangeFace · 11/11/2022 22:21

I feel like a bit of a misfit. In many ways I'm confident, chatty, even funny on a good day. I do active hobbies and am in a couple of clubs. I'm the first to the pub at work. But I have very few friends and have periods where I feel desperately lonely.

I've always been fiercely independent and colleagues describe me as a private person. I know I need to make more of an effort to fit in but I just seem to keep making excuses (eg choosing to do a solo weekend trip rather than stay home and do something I'm less enthused about, but that involves others).

It feels like there's an invisible barrier between me and other people - I share the "public" part of me but forming closer bonds with people takes me a long time, even though I crave that closeness. I get crushes on inappropriate people which i guess means I'm lonely but kinda sabotaging. After so long in solitary confinement with lockdown I'm not sure I'm even capable of meaningful social interaction.

I'm bipolar which rules out romantic relationships and means there'll be times I can't face seeing people which doesn't help.

Can anyone identify with this, and if so what did you do about it?

OP posts:
loseridiot · 12/11/2022 14:27

Yes because of trust issues. It's hard isn't it? I'm lonely and would love a family and good friends but have been let down to a point that I can't take the risk and perfer to be lonely, although that isn't what I want, if that makes sense?!

Despite being chatty and positive in company as well, I'm very private due to being let down and used.

Flowers
flflflf · 12/11/2022 14:30

have you got a pet OP? Maybe a dog or a cat could help you feel less lonely.

Heytheredeliah · 12/11/2022 14:51

sorry to hear that you feel this way. i agree that a pet would be a good idea. i would love to have a pet to help me cope with loneliness

Summerhillsquare · 12/11/2022 18:57

I suspect I am like this, but no idea what to do about it.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page