If a guy offers to pick you up for a date

[Iwritethissittinginthekitchensink]

If a guy offers to pick you up for a dinner date, and you say yes, does that mean sex is on the cards?

and if you say no to the lift, does that mean you’re ruling out sex on that occasion?

It means he knows where you live!
I'd avoid until you're sure about him.

🙄

Of course sex isn't a given.

Sex is irrelevant surely? Why does there have to be secret meanings behind everything?
Something that happens before the date has no relevance to what happens after, your date could be shit.

I wouldn’t accept a lift from someone I didn’t know well. Not because of what it might or might not signify; just for safety.

But no, generally speaking, accepting a lift from someone does not mean that you’ve given consent to sex.

Eh? 🥴

No. You just don't give out your address to someone you don't know, eg from online dating. You either meet at the place, or he picks you up from down the road.

Not at all, agreeing to have sex with him is the only indication that you're agreeing to have sex with him.
There are no codes, no assumptions or hidden meanings when it comes to consensual sex. If he thinks there are, you might want to think twice about having sex with him at all.

doesn't it depend on whether it's a 3 door fiesta or a range rover ?
is OP male by any chance ?

This! I would never let anyone pick me up for a date at my home if I barely know him. I wouldn't want him to to know where I live.

Outside of that I don't know what that has to do with the expectation of having sex or not.

I think as a general rule of thumb, if a date drops you home and you invite them inside for a coffee or nightcap then it’s a euphemism for sex. At least it was in my day, I haven’t been on a date for over 20 years!

Thats not to say it’s consent.

I’d hope times have changed and you can be a bit more upfront with saying whether you want to have sex after the date.

What the hell?!

God knows where you get that it insinuates sex, but it's not good practice to let a guy know where you live in the early stages, and get in a car with him!

Be aware of what he's picking you up with. One chap turned up on a motorbike for me & I was like nooooo wayyyy am I getting on that. Date over

Sex in a car is fun, go for it 🤣

Sex is only on the cards if there is chemistry, connection between the people involved. It has nothing to do with transport

I’m not talking about consent and that it might be a done deal, but more about hopes/expectations - whether sex is on the cards.

I’m very much female. I met a man from OLD today. He’s dated a lot and I’ve not dated much. So I wondered if I was being naive about some dating code.

This was his view: that if a woman says yes to him offering to pick her up for dinner (he was talking about the first few dates) then he felt she was implying that she’s open to having sex after dinner. And if she said no, he felt she was ruling out sex that night.

I’m not meeting him again and would never get into someone’s car until I’d known them for a while!

Hell no!!

Neither does coffee afterwards, either she invites or he asks for an invite.
I like quite a few programmes on TV now where she 'might be asking' or simply invites for a coffee and he declines.

Oh WOW. What a charmer! That's his incredibly incorrect view, not a commonly held understanding. I think you have good instincts on this guy though!

Also - LOVE your username!!

@SnackyOnassis thanks!

He was basically looking for a partner to solve his boredom and loneliness - not for me!

Sounds like his wishful thinking, if he dates a lot I'd say most wouldn't accept a lift for a first date. Even if you are looking for something casual, the first date is to see if you actually fancy them or not and you could still go home together at the end 🤷‍♀️

I definitely wouldn't accept a lift, I'd drive myself so I can have a quick getaway if I'm not feeling it and it would be somewhere fairly local.

No, I want to have a drink and not have the designated driver sipping coke next to me. Plus I'm more likely to think having a shag is a brilliant idea if I'm drinking. I feel like that should be a mutually tipsy decision for some reason.

Your question is irrelevant - because you should never let a stranger know where you live and you certainly shouldn't get in their car.

I've had hassle from1st date guys (because I haven't been interested in seeing them again), and thank god they never knew where I lived.

My area in the news today, a man lured a woman into his car 'to go for coffee' and ended up taking her to a secluded spot and raping her. So no, never accept a lift from a man you don't know well enough to know you're safe

@mourndayclub that’s awful.

Urghhhh still feeling a bit rattled by this guy. It ended with him saying he thought I needed to experience good sex (without knowing any of my sexual history - I’ve had good and bad sex) and to let him know if I was interested 🤢