Hi everyone
I’m sure this has been discussed many times but I am after a bit of support and advice.
myself and Gf have been together for several years. We now have a 2 year old child.
it’s been tough but I don’t anything unusual compared to others. I can see that my gf has struggled with some depression and has had some difficult times.
we have had some challenging times with parenting. I will be honest to say that I know there have been times when I have shouted/got angry. This has definitely not helped matters and I know my gf has struggled with that. I feel that I have improved that in recent months.
A major issue I’m struggling with is our relationship. It seems non existent. We never spend time together as a couple and it just seems like we are two people looking after a child.
we haven’t had sex since or child arrived. So that’s over two years. I completely understand that it isn’t really a priority. However, I could probably accept that if there was other affection within the relationship, but there isn’t. There is no hugging, touching and I cannot remember the last time we kissed.
I did use to try and initiate some affection but it felt like it wasn’t wanted. I sometimes feel like we are now strangers in that area, and it just feels a bit alien.
part of me feels like this is why I sometimes get angry at other situations because in reality it’s that I am unhappy about our relationship generally
I have mentioned some of this in part to her but a long time ago. She just seems to think that we just need to get through this part, I don’t really know what that means. It feels as if it has been left too long and its difficult to get back.
It does seem as if she is now getting all the affection she needs from our child, perhaps that is true I don’t know. But surely she would want to try with our relationship, perhaps she simply doesn’t find me attractive in that way anymore
I’ve had moments when I have thought about ending the relationship but the thought of doing that seems so painful. I cannot imagine not being with me child every day and the impact the would have on him would be so sad for him and me.
I feel like I probably need to raise these issues with her, although in lots ways I am scared to do so.
sorry for the ramble but any advice welcome
thank you