Can you be friends with an ex?

[Supernova18]

My ex has blocked me on everything (since he told me he was dating someone who would be staying at his house when my daughter is and that they are going on holiday. My daughter is 11 months. I did not react and he asked me why I have not). He has blocked me until new year. He has messaged my mum saying that 'he hopes we will be friends soon'. He cheated on me, left me pre pregnancy and after and that isn't a friend I want. I know we have to coparent, so I was wondering if anyone has any positive stories?

Friendship has nothing to do with it. Communicate only about the children. Many, many couples break up and make this work.

I wouldn't even consider co parenting until he grows up and unblocks you, you need to be able to contact him about your child when needed.
Co parenting can work when you discuss the children only and can co operate, no need to be his friend.

You don’t have to be friends, civil works fine but no need for friendship

You don’t need to be friends to co parent well. You just need to both have your child’s interests in mind and want them to have the best childhood they can despite having separated parents - which means a secure contact structure for her, communication about her needs, being able to agree on what’s best for her, and having a relationship with each other which isn’t hostile or argumentative.

No you can't be friends with somebody who has no respect for you and plays stupid games.

Yes you can coparent with an ex.

Ugh he sounds so manipulative. Blocking you then messaging your mum saying he wants to be your friend? What a twit. He’s just trying to mess with your head because the attention makes him feel important.

Suggest you have as little to do with him as possible.

Yes it's perfectly possible to be friends with an ex. When you broke up amicably, never stopped treating each other with respect, still like each other but there's zero attraction.

But in your case - no it isn't possible. Because he simply isn't your friend. He hasn't treated you like a friend, so why does he say he wants to be friends? He isn't your friend, he's already shown you that. Friends don't do the dirty on you and they don't lie to you. Why on earth would he think you'd want to see him ever again, let alone be his friend?

I imagine he wants to look like the good guy, and you being his friend would prove that to the outside world.

He really isn't friendship material is he?

Friends don't do the things he did to you.

Just ignore him.

Anyone can successfully co-parent but only with an adult.

I’m really good friends with my eldest daughters father, my youngest daughters father won’t even co parent, so I’m experiencing 2 polar opposites!

Yes of course you can be friends with an ex. But only if they treat you with respect, is kind, you trust them and they are have integrity.

Your ex sounds like he has none of these and a complete cock, with that in mind I'd not WANT to be friends with him.

Hi guys,
been dating a guy for 7 months all going swimmingly other than my concern with his friendship with his ex. he had a five year relationship end just over a year ago. She ended it with him but he says he agreed it was for the best. He says they were living togeather as friends for the last 7/8 months before it ended.
her name used to come up every other time we saw each other in the first few months which led me to ask him if he was over her to which he replied ‘I think so, just as friends’. Around three months in to our relationship he met up 1 and 1 with her which at the time he mentioned the day after. He said they are finally at a place where they can be friends..yet only a week before he had said ‘he thinks he is over her’ which didn’t fill me with confidence and her name was coming up fairly regularly in conversation.
since this occasion he has met with her once a month for drinks. I have aired that it makes me anxious to which he has said he is with me now and I need to trust him to which I agree. We see each other 3/4 times a week and he sees her once a month. He says if it’s not to awkward we should meet at a point in time.
im an anxious person in general but my head is spinning. Does this sound like a healthy friendship or not? To me a need to see each other once a month seems a lot?! Am I over thinking this?
just to add they share no kids etc and moved to this city togeather. He openly says mutual friends find it weird they are able to be friends.
would very much appreciate everyone’s advice :)

No you can t hé betrayaded you and lied to you. Don t answer to his messages. You only answer if it concerns your child

@Sarakelly232 You'd probably be better starting your own new thread, people will probably just answer the original post and not see yours.

Start new thread link: www.mumsnet.com/talk/create-thread?topic=relationships