Need your opinions

[Whitecistus]

Hi all,

I’m 32, no children, been with my partner for 8 years (split after 2 for about 6 months) then got back together. He has 2 kids 11 & 13.
we bought a house together about a year ago, after renting together for a while and it just hasn’t been the same since. I think a lot of it is because he runs his own business now and is very stressed.
We argue a LOT. About everything. We don’t seem to agree on much.
But when it’s good, it’s really good, he is my best friend and I love him very much.
Since I met him I can’t imagine being with anyone else but life is just more down than up now.

We have said about starting our own family but I think he only agrees to this to please me. He said he felt he was “done with having children”

Im so stuck on whether to cut our losses and move out/split up. Or whether long term relationships are sometimes difficult and we could work on it.
I don’t want to end up alone and without any children 😞
How do you know when to call it quits for good?

What are you arguing about? It doesn’t sound a healthy relationship- do you want children? Is it a dealbreaker if he doesn’t?

I think if you argue a lot, that tells you something… disagreeing is fine but it doesn’t sounds like happy, healthy relationship at all.
What do you mean by he is your best friend?

It all depends on what the cause of your arguments are?

if there’s lots of petty disagreements it could be because there are big issues under the surface that one or either of you is in denial about

Arguing is just silly things, not full on blazing rows but bickering
Over who does what round the house etc
Yes I would like children
By being my best friend I mean I can be my true self with him, I can talk to him about anything, he has supported me through some very crap times

You would like a good relationship and children. You have got a crap relationship with a man who doesn't want any more children. I'd get out now and give yourself the best opportunity to find someone lovely to have a family with.

Looks like it’s the end of the road for your relationship, op. He doesn’t really want kids, and you keep bickering. It will only get worse if you have children,

@Mynoodlesareoodles thank you. I think I came here for unbiased hard truths! Because I can’t get that from anyone that knows me

Is it that he said he would have children but has been backing off from the idea?

You should call his bluff?

Tell him no baby and you are walking!!

@Quitelikeit he definitely would have another baby but I think is backing away because of how we’ve been… which I understand.
but I still get the vibe from him that if we did have a family it would be because I want to. Not because he does too. He feels he is getting too old and now his children are getting older aswell I think he isn’t keen on doing it all again